Gomen ne, InuYasha
by PuraStones
Summary: What if InuYasha forgot all about his friends and become an assassin that killed every youkai and ningen in his sight? Will his friends and his brother, Sesshomaru find a solution to bring the hanyou back to who he was? Rate K because there's nothing bad. Discontinued.
1. Where is the limit?

Disclaim: InuYasha doesn't belong to me, but the content of this story does... I guess.

I'll make this one short, so I don't have to work on it for a long time. I still have a long one called "My little brother", but it seemed like people had lost their interest in it. If readers really don't enjoy my story anymore, I'll stop writing for a while to have a rest… Reviews will be a comfort, because I really don't need to rest anyway.

**Gomen ne, InuYasha.**

**Chapter 1: Where is the limit?**

After a nasty battle with a bunch of stinky demons, the pack sat together by their campfire again. Miroku, Sango and Kiara stayed quiet while watching the same play every day: Shippo and InuYasha fighting then Kagome stopped their battles by lecturing and sitting the hanyou. It had become routine now and that was what they called "normalness". Right on time, Shippo opened his little mouth:

"InuYasha, you're still very weak, aren't you? Can't even deal with tainted shards and need help from Kagome!"

InuYasha bared his fangs and growled murderously:

"Watch it, brat. I was in the bloody battle while you hiding and shivering like a coward!"

"Hey!"

"Oh, I forgot. In fact, you **are** a coward!"

"Who do you call a coward, wimpy hanyou?" – mocked Shippo.

Okay, that was it. He hated that most, the hanyou and the wimp words. Raising his claws, he held Shippo in his hands with his face-of-fury. Before anything could happen, he heard:

"SIT BOY!"

His instinct prepared himself for the impact and the smell of dirt entered his nostrils. Painfully, he rose up from the ground and nabbed the little brat-demon. Shippo wasn't satisfied yet. He mocked harder:

"You're such a big bully to young kids and a wimp in front of daiyoukai, like Sesshomaru!"

"You're going to regret that!" – His older bastard brother was bought into the conversation was the worst.

"I think Shippo is kind of right." – whispered from Sango to Miroku, caught by InuYasha's keen doggy ears.

"The only thing you DO is WET your pants!" – InuYasha hissed angrily.

"SIT SIT SIT SIT SIT SIT SIT!" – shouted Kagome.

After ten minutes, InuYasha regained his normal state with a bleeding cheek. He stood up and looked straight at Kagome:

"For Kami's sake, he's a demon. Why do you have to pamper him?"

"He's a little kid, idiot! How could you treat him like that?" – scolded the miko.

"Didn't you listen to me? HE IS A **DEMON**!" – emphasized the second sentence.

That wench, she thought kids must gain gentle and polite treatment from the older, but she had no idea what _I _had gained in my childhood. That brat was a demon, for crying out loud! – thought the hanyou bitterly.

"IT DOESN'T CHANGE HIS AGE!" – shouted Kagome.

_So that means being a hanyou changes my age. _– Hot blood rose in his veins.

"At least KEEP HIS MOUTH SHUT!" – screamed the hanyou.

"He's just telling the truth." – Miroku, Sango and Kagome said together.

What was this kind of feeling after hearing that sentence? He asked himself. InuYasha felt like he wanted to explode, or at least lose his conscious for a while just to end the horrible feeling he was having at the moment. He couldn't explain: he was MAD. The hanyou was on the brink of insanity. He wanted to cry, to scream, to break something. But trying his best to reason with himself, he sat down and folded his arms in front of his chest while staring at the flame to send all his agony and fury into the dancing fire. If he argued any longer, he might kill someone (if his demon-blood took control again). That was his fear, being a soulless killer, a heartless monster…

Nightfall, the air was cool. His temper cooled down along with the wind. The hanyou was the only one who was still awake. He couldn't sleep because those emotions were still overcoming him. If he slept, he only had dreams of his pathetic childhood and the tears that his okasan spilled for him, or his hatred towards all creatures around him. The moon was getting smaller and soon it would be the moonless night. He sat there, like a statue, staring at the dead flame. How strong his ability to suffer was? Was it enough for him to live in peace and ignore those insults that people throw at him? InuYasha looked at the moon and sighed:

"Time would tell."

Behind the bush across from the pack, a pair of bright red eyes stared at the hanyou with amusement.

"Looks like his companions had crossed his limit. He's exactly what we need."

Another person, with creepy orange eyes, replied:

"He seemed to be their protector. I don't think he would join us willingly."

"Then we have to use force. Wait until the secret night of his and then we will execute our plan."

"I think there's a person who could get answer from him before we ask him. She mentioned him before."

The one with red eyes asked curiously:

"Who's that? InuYasha is surly distrustful. Who could have a conversation with him without a fight?"

"Remember the cute little half-bat-demon in our pack, Shiori? She met him once; he helped her kicking her bastard grandpa's ass. He would have no doubt or caution talking to her about his feelings. She's like him."

"Oh, we'll arrange that conversation. Tell Shiori so she could prepare herself. Tomorrow isn't early for that."

"Sure, sure. We'll have our chance soon enough."

With that, they ran away leaving no trace.


	2. Sides of a hanyou's heart

Disclaim: InuYasha doesn't belong to me, but the content of this story does.

I'd like to thank Wingless Hymn and Tensa-Zanghetsu102 for their wonderful reviews and apologize that I won't update so often if I don't get bigger quantity of reviews. :D

**Chapter 2: Sides of a hanyou's heart.**

A new day began again. The sun woke up early, but not as early as the hanyou did. In fact, he didn't sleep so he didn't need to wake up at all. His companions opened their eyes and yawned tiredly after a long sleep. Kagome groaned when she got out of her sleeping bag. Shippo still slept soundly on Kagome's shoulder. InuYasha stood up and waited patiently for his friends, but mostly he was deep in thoughts. The hanyou was still ache a bit after last night but he ignored and got used to the annoying pain. There was no miasma in the air this morning and things seem so peaceful. It wouldn't last long that was the ugly truth. After his friends finished, they were on the way again. Kagome didn't sense any jewel shards, which brought frustration and depression to all the members. Even a breeze of miasma or scent of Naraku wasn't caught. Things were unclear. Minor demons messed up with villagers more often. They were free from Naraku's orders and could do whatever they wanted. The pack passed through lots of villages and destroyed the demons that were disturbing people's lives. Nothing was too serious until Kagome shouted:

"I sense a jewel shard. Come on guys!"

"Let's go!" – rushed InuYasha, carrying Kagome on his back while the others climbed on Kiara.

Soon, they reached a field and there was an old man standing at the middle of it. For InuYasha, he could smell the youki coming from the man's body. He asked himself why a mere human could have that kind of smell and stayed alert for the worst thing to happen. Kagome seemed hesitate, she didn't want to steal the shard from the old man. Miroku said:

"I guess we don't need a fight to take this one."

"I'm not sure, monk. Don't you sense anything unusual from that old hag?"

"InuYasha! Be polite, he's an old man!" – scolded Kagome.

"You judge that through his appearance. You are affected by cute and poor creatures. How could you be so sure?" – grumbled the hanyou.

"You attack everything which has jewel shards!"

InuYasha counted from 1 to 10 in his head to avoid a mouth-fight which had an obvious ending that his face would visit the surface of dirt again. Kagome greeted the man:

"Good morning there, oji-san."

"Hi, visitors. What brings you to the field of this poor man?" – smiled the man, but the hanyou found something not right about that creepy smile. He narrowed his eyes.

"Do you know that there is a shard of the Shikon Tama Jewel in your back? We'd like to know where you got it from." – said Kagome politely.

"Sure, my dear. Why don't you come to my little cottage to talk? All of you could rest there today." – replied the man kindly.

InuYasha didn't trust the man because of the youki he sensed and that fake kind face. There was definitely a trick behind this man. His youkai instinct hardly ever mistook something like that, especially after a hard childhood. The pack got to the old man's dark home where a pretty young woman was waiting for him. The terrifying beauty of her was caught by Miroku. The old man beamed and introduced:

"She's my lovely daughter. Her mother died long time ago. Make yourself at home."

Miroku immediately reached the woman's side and gave her a dumb smile:

"Hello there, you must have been through a hard lifetime. What if I make your life more beautiful?"

"Knock it off, stupid monk. Stop being a flirt." – scolded InuYasha, shaking his head lightly.

"DEMON!" – shouted the woman. – "Get him away from HERE!"

"No worries, my beautiful lady. He's harmless when I'm here." – said Miroku.

InuYasha wanted to punch that face of his friend, but he scratched his own hands to stay cool instead. He grumbled:

"Guys, I don't think staying here is a good idea. We should get the shard and keep going."

"Don't be rude, the shard is his. We can't just take it without asking permission!" – lectured Kagome.

"The shards don't belong to anyone, including us. We're collecting them just because you were the one who BROKE the jewel and the only one who could destroy it." – hissed the hanyou.

"InuYasha, SIT!" – shouted Kagome angrily.

This time, InuYasha got up quickly after the impact and scolded:

"I was telling the TRUTH! If you need me, I'd be outside."

With that, he hurried walking out to the field again. He needed to be alone before he lost it all. InuYasha hissed:

"Who does she think she is? I feel like a dog."

The hanyou went for a stroll, close enough to the cottage in case there was truly something wrong with that old man. The place was quite near a river. Looking at the clear blue water, he had a familiar feeling. The feeling he had when he met someone who had the same life as him. InuYasha felt someone was coming towards him. The scent of this person was familiar, too. He surly met this one somewhere. A gentle low voice coming behind him:

"Is there a place for me to stand next to you?"

He turned around and met bright violet eyes. She was the hanyou that he saved not so long ago, named Shiori. She still wore her white garments with black little flowers on the silky sash. There were no bruises that was visible on her skin, which showed that no-one bullied her recently or just because her ability to heal was excellent. InuYasha nodded lightly:

"It's nice to meet ya again, little bat hanyou. Come here, as you wish."

"It's nice to see my savior again, InuYasha ni-chan." – beamed Shiori kindly.

"How are you lately? And why are you here?" – asked InuYasha warily. He pitied the little girl for having the same fate like him.

"My mom died peacefully not so long ago. I traveled around, that's all. My ability helped me a lot." – replied Shiori. – "How about you, ni-chan?"

"Sorry to hear that. That happens to every hanyou; don't feel bad about it if you do. I'm okay, thanks." – answered InuYasha boringly.

"I don't know how I could understand the word 'okay' of yours, InuYasha ni-chan." – chuckled the other hanyou lightly.

"Cut the ni-chan off, will ya? I don't need such respect like that. We're at the same place." – said older hanyou playfully.

"I thought you ask for respect from the others." – asked Shiori, while raising her eyebrow.

"Not respect, just simply acceptance." – InuYasha lied fluently, he did ask for respect, but that was too much for a hanyou.

"It doesn't seem like that. You were pretty upset minutes ago." – Shiori pointed out the obvious.

"Did you follow me, Shiori?" – asked InuYasha annoyingly but he beamed lightly at the younger hanyou.

"No actually, I was just around and caught your scent." – Shiori shrugged. – "I just want to talk with you and ask if you want to come with me."

"Come with you? Where? I could take you there if you want."- offered InuYasha. There was nothing useful to do at the moment; he surly could give her a little help.

"I don't think I'm going anywhere, InuYasha ni-chan. I just travel around the country to help other hanyous. There are a lot of us out there who needs protection and friends." – said Shiori, looked at InuYasha hopefully, using her cute face.

InuYasha stared at her for a few seconds. He was stunned by her invitation. It was so tempting, to travel with the ones who had the same blood and tragic fate like him, to have a real family for once. But he had to fulfill his mission, his duty. He shook his head sadly:

"I'm really sorry, Shiori. As you know, I still have…"

"Things to do? Friends to protect? Jewel shards to hunt? Enemies to defeat? Am I right?" – Shiori asked gently. She knew that was his answer.

"Exactly. I truly am sorry. Perhaps after I finished what I have started then I'll join you without regrets or hesitation." – InuYasha kneeled down so his eyes could look straight into the pretty violet eyes of the girl.

"InuYasha ni-chan, I need you _right now_ and so does the other hanyous. Let me tell you something. You have better things to do then run around with that little demon, the cat and the ningens in your current pack. There are hanyous out there who needs your protection desperately more than your friends do. Those jewel shards are supposed to be collected by the mikos, not you, a hanyou! And the enemies you must defeat, you will do that when you protect the other hanyous! Think about it, ni-chan. Please?" – Shiori blinked her eyes and grasped for air after the long explanation.

InuYasha was frozen. Shiori was too right. He did have better things to do then run around with his pack and suffered the mocks from the demon brat. He desired to protect and live with other hanyous. And InuYasha absolutely did have other enemies defeat when he defended his kind. But just think of Naraku, torturing mankind and demon race, collecting jewel shards and soon he'd conquer the world, which made InuYasha berserk. He took a deep breath. Both sides needed him, but his current friends acted like they didn't. He didn't blame them. He knew how ill his manners were, but they were the scars that he received from his childhood so he couldn't help it. Wounds healed, but the scars didn't. InuYasha swallowed air into his stomach, tried to consider things right. Shiori noticed the crazy situation that her friend was in, so she spoke:

"InuYasha ni-chan, ningens and youkais detest us, so why do we need to defend them? We need to avoid them and fight back if we can! May I ask you, what do you get if you protect the current pack of yours?"- Shiori wanted InuYasha to admit the truth, the truth that he must accept.

InuYasha opened his mouth, but no words could escape his mouth. The hanyou was confused with himself. He didn't know what he really wanted to do. InuYasha said:

"Shiori, please don't make me choose between this and that. I understand your reasons and logics, but I have my own reasons to protect my companions. They surly are annoying and ungrateful sometimes but… After all Shiori, I've got myself into this mess, and then I'd get out of it before I want to do anything else. You want me to fight demons and humans, I understand that. But why would we lower our value by doing the exact things that they do? If we seek for revenge, we'll become like them, the creatures that we ourselves hate! Shiori, what hanyous want is a peaceful life and a true family, not revenge. Don't get yourself into trouble like I did. We'll meet again soon. Right now, I have to go on with my duties. I'm sorry, again." – InuYasha gave Shiori a piece of his mind. He wanted the little hanyou not to repeat his mistake by living with her hatred.

Shiori sighed and stayed quiet. The result was expected, but she had remembered every word that InuYasha said. If she had a chance, she would repeat the exact words of InuYasha for his companions to hear. Shiori nodded her head hard, her eyes were sad. She whispered gently:

"The InuYasha ni-chan, if that's what your choice, do as you wish. I hope you'll succeed. Good-bye and good luck."

InuYasha stood up and waved at Shiori until she was out of his sight. He sighed and considered everything he told her again. He did want revenge, even he knew that wasn't a smart choice. They couldn't defeat demons; especially most demons were under Sesshomaru's protection. Three kinds despised two others: demons looked down to humans and hanyous; hanyous felt indignant at demons and humans; humans were terrified demons and hanyous. It was a crazy world. Trying to sweep all the thoughts out his mind, he heard a scream. It came from Kagome. He rushed to the cottage in a few minutes and found the old man had turned into a nasty demon with a long tongue and horns on his body while the woman was throwing deadly weapons at his companions. Miroku was using Kazaana and Sango was throwing her Hiraikotsu. Shippo was crying on Kagome's shoulder when the miko tried to reach her bow and arrows. InuYasha sighed at the scene. He knew there was something wrong about the old bastard. The hanyou took out Tessaiga and screamed:

"Kaze no Kizu!"

The demonic power coming from the sword cut the demons into pieces. They were minor demons. The jewel shard flew out of the old bastard's back and landed on InuYasha's hand. He threw it to Kagome and said:

"What did I say about these people?"

"If your instincts were sharper you would have stopped this attack!" – Shippo cried while he was still shivering.

InuYasha wanted to give the kid and blast but stopped. He was still deep in thoughts about the conversation with Shiori. He just shrugged and said:

"Let's keep going, we wasted an amount of time at this fucking place."

After that, the group was on their way again. Soon they found a village and asked for a place to rest for the night. The villagers were terrified at InuYasha again and he had to sleep in a tree near the village. The others rested in a guest house the village when the moon started to shine again. No arguments tonight because InuYasha chose to hunt for raw meat. He was tired of eating cooked food. It never filled his tummy, because his needs were different from humans' and his companions never had any idea about that. Pinning his fangs into the fur of his prey, he apologized mutely for stealing the life away from the poor animal. Having quiet space for himself was great. The night after tomorrow would be the moonless night and he had to take cover again. It would be disaster if his enemies found out about his weakness. InuYasha had regrets about revealing his weakness to his companions but he ignored it. What's done was done, he couldn't cry over split milk. All he wanted was to enjoy a peaceful night…

* * *

Somewhere not far away from his tree, a group of hanyous was discussing with Shiori about her conversation with InuYasha. The young bat hanyou was repeating the whole conversation for her friends and comrades to listen:

"He meant what he said: _I understand your reasons and logics, but I have my own reasons to protect my companions. They surly are annoying and ungrateful sometimes but… After all Shiori, I've got myself into this mess, and then I'd get out of it before I want to do anything else. You want me to fight demons and humans, I understand that. But why would we lower our value by doing the exact things that they do? If we seek for revenge, we'll become like them, the creatures that we ourselves hate! Shiori, what hanyous want is a peaceful life and a true family, not revenge. Don't get yourself into trouble like I did._"

"He's not sure what he wants. He didn't give you the straight answer. He's in denial with himself. We'll decide for him. Base on his youki, his human night is near. We have to take this chance or we have to wait for another month." – The oldest of them said.

"Then let's make a specific plan and so that we'll execute it without mistakes." – said Shiori. – "I wonder if InuYasha ni-chan would be mad at we'd do to him."

"Don't worry too much, my dear sister. After a while, I'm sure he'll know. Different brains, different thoughts. We can't do anything about that. But we need to show the world that hanyous are just normal living creatures that need acceptance and respect. InuYasha is the second strongest hanyou. The female hanyou who has no name in our pack is the most powerful. I'm sure she could spend some time with InuYasha. I think the dog hanyou would probably get along with her!" – The one with creepy green eyes said in amuse.

"Time would tell, sis. Time would tell…"

_A/N: __**What do you think readers? If you want to read more, then you have to give me some reviews. I've already carried on the next chapter, but I won't post it until I have 5 or more reviews! Sesshomaru will play an important role in this story too, but not in the first chapters.**_


	3. What heart really wants

Disclaim: InuYasha doesn't belong to me, but the content of this story does.

Thank you Wingless Hymn and Tensa-Zanghetsu102 for your reviews.

To Ulaire: Ah, I'm sorry. I know it's not fair but life isn't fair. But stop being upset, because here's the next chapter!

_Warning__: There would be character's death in this chapter, well, maybe not really, but the character I'm talking about would be on the brink of death. You'll see._

**Chapter 3: What heart really wants**

InuYasha was cautious. Tonight was the moonless night and he would become ningen. The hanyou's senses were weakening and that just drove him insane. He felt so useless! There was a bunch of enemies to fight and he was powerless. InuYasha rubbed his long black hair in depression. But his companions were still having a good time enjoying their night like usual. This time, they were playing cards with Kagome. The miko had brought some modern games so they could play in their free time. Shippo was sitting on Kagome's shoulder while watching the adults playing. The sweet taste of his lollipop made him speechless. The hanyou couldn't understand why his friends could have fun while this would be the perfect time for nerves to be stretched.

Soon, shouki was easily sensed in the air. Everyone stayed silent and scanned the area for anything unusual. Immediately, Shippo hid behind Kiara while the others prepared themselves for an attack. Sango readied her Hiraikotsu, Miroku held his staff tightly also readied to open Kazaana while Kagome prepared her bow and arrows. InuYasha bared his human's teeth, his dark violet orbs were like glowing in the dark. Kagome said:

"InuYasha, you better hide. We shouldn't let anyone find out about your human night."

"Keh, I'm staying! I'm not leaving you guys. I'm not a coward!"

"Come on, this is the perfect time to be a coward! When we need you not to be a coward then you are exactly one!" – laughed Shippo.

InuYasha gave Shippo a death glare; he looked terrifying even in his human form with that look of his face. Shippo shivered like a leaf. Sango scolded:

"InuYasha, there's no time for this. Go, and don't be our burden!"

"WHAT?" – shouted the hanyou in disbelief.

But before anyone could react, a scary laugh entered their eardrums. Naraku appeared behind the smoke of shouki with his allies, Kagura and Kanna. The dark hanyou smirked:

"Well, you look weak in this from, InuYasha."

"I'm strong enough to kick your ass!" – protested the other hanyou.

"Where's Kohaku?" – asked Sango angrily.

"Oh, you look like you're in a hurry." – A creepy beam formed on Naraku's lips. – "It seems like I chose the perfect night to take all the shards from you."

"In your dreams!" – screamed InuYasha while dodging Kagura's deathly blow of sharp winds.

Sango threw her Hiraikotsu towards Naraku but it rebounded because of the barrier of the dark hanyou. Kagome shot an arrow to break Naraku's barrier but it was futile. He smirked:

"You can never be the second Kikyou, Kagome."

The miko hissed angrily while shooting another arrow. Seeing a blast flying towards her, InuYasha rushed and pushed her out of its direction. Kagome hissed:

"Don't be reckless for once, InuYasha!"

The hanyou sighed then stayed focus in this disadvantage battle. They needed to retreat and hid in a safe place. Sango was injured because of Kagura's blasts. Miroku covered her and got hurt himself. They were all on Kiara's back. The cat demon looked pretty pissed, too. InuYasha shouted:

"Don't you dare to think of that, bastard Naraku!"

But Naraku had released his stinky tentacles and wrapped him and his friends. One of the tentacles was reaching for Kagome's jewel shards. InuYasha struggled desperately. Sango fainted breathing in shouki. Miroku breathed hard covering his nose with his garment. Kiara hissed furiously and hopelessly. They were in gravely danger. InuYasha used all his strength to free himself from the disgusting tentacles. The hanyou managed to get his arms free. Sweat raced on his pale cheeks. He shouted:

"Kagome, try to purify the shouki around you to breath!"

InuYasha was affected by the miasma, too. He was human and just like his companions, he couldn't stand tainted air. The hanyou-now-human started to feel dizzy, but he told himself not to give in. His friends needed help. Trying best to break free, his muscles were screaming. Suddenly an arrow hit the tentacle which was wrapping him and purified almost all the shouki surrounded him. InuYasha shouted:

"Arigatou Kagome!"

The tentacle weakened and InuYasha didn't waste his chance. He knew that he didn't have enough power or strength to fight with the damn dark hanyou and the wind sorcerer, so he took the arrow with him just in case. He dodged all the tentacles on his way and reached the tentacle which was taking the shards away. Naraku smirked:

"You never know when to give up, don't you InuYasha?"

"Giving up is not in my dictionary, bastard!" – screamed InuYasha strongly. – "I won't stop fighting until my heart stops beating!"

"Oh really? Then I think I would have to make you stop fighting!" – said Naraku while releasing more shouki to InuYasha's direction.

The hanyou knew that he can run if he wanted, but he would so not going to leave his friends. His friends **won't **die. Not NOW! Not EVER! Not when he could do something to prevent it. But something awakened in him at that moment. A memory. His mom's voice hit him: "_Run as fast as you could, InuYasha! Run as long as you could! Run if you have a chance to!" _InuYasha hesitated for a quarter of second, kept punching and scratching the tentacles in vain. He asked himself: _"Was running away really what I want to do right now?" _Before he could think of the answer, a **NO **entered his mind. It came from his heart. Running away wasn't in his nature. InuYasha growled in frustration as Naraku completed the whole jewel with the last shards. The light of the jewel was glowing in Naraku's dirty tentacles. It was being tainted by Naraku's corruption but Kagome's presence made the light in the jewel last. The tentacle which was holding was right _in front of _the jewel, making him feel the power of the Shikon Tama transferring to Naraku. Dawn was breaking; InuYasha was begging the sun to hurry. Naraku smirked:

"I'll have you while you transform, InuYasha."

While saying that, Naraku started to absorb InuYasha into his body. The hanyou felt his strength was coming back to him, but not in time. It was second until he was completely absorbed. His visions were blurring because of blood lost. His friends were dying. Their breaths were urgent. The jewel's tiny light was fading. It was now or never, all of nothing. InuYasha growled loudly:

"NOT WHEN I'M STILL BREATHING!"

With that, he stabbed the arrow through his chest and straight through the Shikon jewel. The spiritual power of the arrow wasn't strong enough, but something strengthened the purification. InuYasha glowed along with the jewel and the arrow. Some sort of power from him was transferring to the arrow and purified the jewel. Naraku screamed in pain. His tainted body couldn't suffer the purified jewel. InuYasha knew that wasn't completely his youki, well, it was, but there was something else… The tentacles were vaporizing in the bloody red dawn. Naraku was shattering into pieces and disappearing along with his body. But a barrier started to form around InuYasha. His friends had regained their consciousness and they saw the terrifying scene. InuYasha, covered in blood, hanging in the middle of the air in a barrier, with an arrow stabbing through his chest and through the pure Shikon Jewel. They screamed:

"INUYASHA!"

The hanyou didn't really know what was happening around him. His brain didn't work well. His visions faded quickly even he commanded himself to stay focus. He could sense that his friends were coming back to life. His pale lips managed to form a small beam. Everyone could hear voice coming from the jewel:

"Hanyou InuYasha, you must make a wish."

Dead silence, then Sango said:

"He's not in conscious, is he?"

"Maybe we should make the wish." – said Shippo hopefully.

"No, it's his and his only." – said the jewel firmly.

InuYasha could hear voices and sounds around him, but didn't totally define what was what. The hanyou grumbled in his throat. The jewel continued:

"I could read every thought in your mind, every emotion of yours right now. Wish what you desire most."

The hanyou remembered the miko's word: _the right wish shall destroy the jewel_. InuYasha cursed himself because he didn't know what the right wish was. He was the one who stabbed the jewel, so he would have to wish. InuYasha knew that Shikon Jewel was leading him to selfish wish. He didn't want anything right now. He wanted to end, end everything right NOW. He felt like he was made of marshmallows. The hanyou managed the let the words out:

"I don't need a damn wish!"

"Stay calm, InuYasha!" – yelled Kagome. – "We'll help you."

"No-one would speak to him NOW! And he can't listen to any of you." – growled the jewel. It was afraid of the hanyou. It wanted the hanyou to make mistake.

"NO!" – screamed his companions. The barrier thickened.

InuYasha knew that his friends couldn't help no matter what they did. It was up to him now, him alone. The hanyou didn't think so hard. He had no idea what was right and what was wrong. The jewel spoke again:

"Wish to be a full-blooded demon and you shall keep your life. You're on the brink of death right now."

"No, I won't!" – whispered InuYasha.

"Do you want to suffer this pain forever?" – asked the jewel.

Everyone else listened to the conversation hopelessly. There was nothing they could do about this. InuYasha said:

"I don't know what matters anymore. I don't care. I don't want to know." – mumbled him painfully.

"Just make the wish, InuYasha." – said the jewel evenly.

InuYasha bit his lips, he tasted his blood. Blood of a daiyoukai and a ningen. As much as he wanted not to have it, he wanted to keep it. Mud blood, half-breed, mongrel, hanyou… it didn't matter. The hanyou with his unbreakable soul listened to his heart. He once told himself that: _"If you're in a bullshit situation, listen to your heart, not your numb head!" _The purity of him gave him an idea. He told himself it was right, then InuYasha smiled mildly and said confidently while his throat wanted to break:

"Shikon Jewel Tama, I'm going to make my wish."

His friends were tense. It was the moment. What the hell was InuYasha thinking? He wanted to get everyone killed? They screamed:

"Don't InuYasha! You're killing us!"

The hanyou was hesitated for a second, but the jewel was waiting. InuYasha emphasized every word:

"_Shikon Jewel Tama…_"

Everyone held their breath…

"_Don't let anyone see or find you again. No-one shall know about your existence from now on."_

With that, the jewel screamed:

"NO!"

Then, InuYasha's visions were sunk into darkness. He fell down and sank into black… He let go everything…

A/N: So do you want me to continue? If you do, give me reviews! Or I'll delete everything I update! Already working on the next chapter, but I won't post until I have some comments and reviews!


	4. You only realize it when you lose it

Disclaim: InuYasha doesn't belong to me, but the content of this story does.

Thank you everyone for your wonderful comments. Here's the next chapter.

**Chapter 4: You only realize what you have until you lose it**

**InuYasha's pack:**

They held their breath when the hanyou made his wish. They had no idea why InuYasha would take this risk so easily like that but they didn't know the horrible agony he was suffering. Sango nearly crush Miroku's hand because of fear. Kagome bit her lips and Shippo hid behind her back. Kiara meowed softly and transformed into her small form. They waited for whatever would come. They considered about the things that InuYasha might wish for. To be a full-blooded demon? To have Kikyou back? Perhaps to be a ningen? Their heads were spinning fast. They never dared to hope that InuYasha would make the right wish.

"_Shikon Jewel Tama… Don't let anyone see or find you again. No-one shall know about your existence from now on." _– spoke the hanyou evenly.

Time seemed to stop. He spit the wish out with no hesitation, but calmly and confidently. Kagome was stunned. There were no doubts, it _was _the right wish. Sango and Miroku froze, but then the monk remembered the curse and quickly checked his Wind Tunnel. It disappeared, his hand looked completely normal. In the air, the Shikon no Tama was vanishing along with the arrow that was stabbing through it. The scream of the jewel faded and silence ruled the area. InuYasha looked like a broken doll when the barrier disappeared. He fell down the ground without reaction. No laugh of victory, no cursing or any movements. His companions were still shocked at the event that they didn't know how to react. Then Kagome rushed to the hanyou's side and whispered urgently:

"InuYasha? InuYasha!"

Quickly, Miroku helped InuYasha to get on Kiara's back. The girls sat behind him while Miroku ran next to them. They rushed towards Kaede's village. The miko was worried. Her heart was racing in her chest. She held the hanyou's torso while her body was shivering. She mumbled:

"Hang in there, InuYasha!"

Shippo sat on Kagome's shoulder and cried:

"He's such a baka! He is always reckless!"

"Leave him alone, Shippo. He can't hear you anyway." – scolded Sango worriedly. She was afraid that InuYasha couldn't deal with the injuries that were threatening his life.

"Besides, he destroyed the jewel. He knows what he was doing and he had no regrets." – said Miroku sadly while tried his best to catch up the cat demon.

Then their throats were blocked by their own emotions. Silently, they reached the village. The villagers were doing their daily routines. The old miko, Kaede was collecting herbs on the field again. When she saw the group, she greeted them:

"Kagome, Miroku, Sango, Shippo, InuYasha, you're back!"

Kaede was speechless when she saw the scene. Their garments were ragged, the dirt darkened their skin. But the worst was InuYasha. There were no intact spots on his body. He was covered in dried blood of his own and probably his enemy's. The fire-rat kimono was dark bloody red and its sleeves were ripped. The one with no injuries was Shippo, because he never fought in battles. Kaede said:

"Come inside, everyone. What happened?"

"Kaede-sama, we did it. We destroyed the Shikon no Tama!" – cheered Shippo. – "But baka InuYasha is injured badly."

"Well, I'm not surprised that he's injured. He's your protector. How did you destroy it?" – asked Kaede curiously. His sister, Kikyou was a powerful miko but she couldn't destroy the jewel then how could this weird pack manage to do that?

"Ask InuYasha. He's the one who did that when we were all tied by Naraku's tentacles." – mumbled Sango sadly. – "He fought until the end like he said and promised us. We felt so useless."

"The hanyou _destroyed _the jewel? How is that possible?" – Kaede was totally shocked by the news.

"Please, heal him first, and then we'll tell you everything, Kaede-sama." – pleaded Kagome. She eyed InuYasha warily. He breathed really slowly, and he was deadly pale. He had regained his hanyou-form, but he was injured so badly in his mortal body.

"Last night was his human night. It was the worst night for a bloody battle." – shook Miroku's head lightly in depression.

InuYasha's face wasn't peaceful, but it didn't show pain or anything either. It was emotionless and hollow and that creep everyone out. He lied still and his body looked lifeless. Kagome's nerves were stretched like violin strings. Sango shivered like she caught a cold. Miroku looked at his friend and prayed god for help. They were wordless because they didn't know what to say.

Kaede quickly prepared some fresh clothes, water and food for the group. Kagome took out some bandages to dress the hanyou's wounds. Sango tried to help the miko with her work. The demon slayer checked her friend's wounds and discovered something. She covered her mouth with her hand and tried to tell herself that her senses were lying to her. Kagome asked:

"What's wrong, Sango?"

"His heart, it beats so slowly!" – whimpered Sango weakly in panic. – "I don't think he'll make it."

"Calm down, child. The tentacles stabbed him, didn't they? Then it wouldn't be that serious." – said Kaede soothingly, but she seemed to convince herself.

"But he also absorbed lots of shouki when he was human!" – said Miroku, his eyes were wide.

"And he was blasted by Kagura's attacks, too!" – squeaked Shippo.

Kagome started to cry. Her tears ran freely on her cheeks. She hissed:

"No, it can't be!"

Now, it was too late for them to recognize how important InuYasha was.

**With the group of hanyous:**

Shiori was terrified of the event. They watched the fight between the InuYasha's pack and Naraku. After seeing the battle, the hanyous retreated to their shelter. Yuna, the hanyou with red eyes and also the oldest of the group, said:

"He's on the brink of death. We have to do something, and quick!"

"But we can't just rush into that old miko's hut and steal his body!" – said Shiori urgently.

"They'll have to get out soon or later. We just have to make sure that his heart still beats." – said Ichiro, the neko hanyou strongly. He admired the inu-hanyou after watching the battle and he didn't want InuYasha to die.

"But we're not gods. We can't revive him when he is already about to join the other world!" – Kihira shook her head in depression. The battle affected her strongly. She'd never seen anyone fighting so stubbornly and having such powerful wills like InuYasha.

"I can if he wants me to." – came a reply.

All heads turned to the source of the voice. It came from a hanyou girl, the most special one in their group. She said she'd prefer to not talk about her name and identify so no-one knew many things about her. But she had ningen blood and youkai blood in her veins, so they invited her to join them. She once saved more than half the members of the group in a bloody battle. The girl seemed to be the most powerful hanyou that existed in the world. She could use any weapons just by looking at them, heal wounds, and purify tainted things also have incredible strength and speed. No-one knew what type of hanyou she was, and the girl refused to tell them. At first, they didn't have much trust in her, but then, she expressed concerns towards other members of the group, they admired her and appreciated her help. She shared her experiences and trained them how to fight. In a word, she had the most important role in the group and everyone respected her and understood her cold behaviors. They believed that her past was something that she didn't want to think about. Shiori asked in disbelief:

"Nee-chan, you can also revive dead people?"

Everyone waited for the answers. They got used to the fact that the answers never came right away, the girl never gave them a straight answer but they weren't bothered by that. It made things more interesting and meaningful. The girl sighed and said:

"You guys have to understand this. _Everything has its price._ Yes, I can revive dead plants, dead rivers like you guys noticed, but to humans and demons, it doesn't work that way."

"Then how does it work? Can you tell us, please nee-chan?" – asked Mitchiko, the phoenix hanyou. She was quite powerful, too. But she often got injured in battles and was healed by the unnamed-hanyou.

"I think you guys know this better than any other creatures." – said the girl softly.

"Wait a second; you said _to humans and demons, it doesn't work that way_. What about to hanyous?" – asked Ichiro in interest.

"Keep going, you're getting the point." – encouraged the girl.

"Let's see. To humans… Humans are stubborn and have unending desires. They value their lives more than anything else. They escape death. That's why it's hard to revive them, because their selfishness, right?" – chirped Haku, the eagle-hanyou.

"You can say so. It's not wrong, but it's not correct either." – said the unnamed-hanyou calmly. – "Don't worry; very least people know the true reasons. But your idea is acceptable."

Haku wasn't sad, he was quite proud of himself. The hanyou smiled happily at the girl. Shiori continued:

"Let's see. Demons are arrogant. They have pride and huge self-confident. They underestimate death. That's why it's difficult to give them life, right nee-chan?"

"Well, this one is quite correct. Underestimating death would make death want to consume them." - nodded the girl.

"Then hanyous… you said you can revive InuYasha, _if he wants_." – Yuna raised her eyebrow.

"Hanyous have blood of demons and humans. They inherit features of both creatures."

"Keep going." – encouraged the girl.

"Hanyous ask for acceptance of demons and humans, because we are outcasts. We are stubborn, but we use our stubbornness to survive." – said Ichiro timidly.

"We don't value our lives, because our lives are suck." – said Mitchiko bitterly. – "We live to fight, fight for fairness."

"We don't escape death, because death is after us every second of our lives. We're tired of running away so that we choose to fight it and face it instead. And we also seek for death ourselves." – stated Sakura, the orca-hanyou.

"But yet we don't underestimate death, because we don't want it to take the others away." – said Arachiko.

Then they were quiet. They looked at the nameless hanyou for replies. The only things they could see of her were her sad blue eyes and smooth pale skin. Her face was covered by the shadow of the hood of her black _kosode_. The girl looked demonic and quite creepy, but the way she acted around her comrades made her gentle and carefree. She nodded her head lightly:

"In a word, with us, to _die and is to live and to live is to die_. In other creatures' point of view, death is a painful end. But with us, life is already painful. We don't accept defeat, so there's no end. With us, there are just new beginnings."

Everyone stayed silence to understand the girl's words. They looked at each other with love and trust. Then, smiles were formed on everyone's lips. They said together:

"We are proud to be hanyous!"

"I can _save _him, but like Yuki said, there's no time to waste. I need his heart still beating. It's the easiest way." – said the girl solemnly.

"Then let's go that village, guys!" – shouted Shiori.

Tying their weapons on their waists, the young hanyous rushed to the human village, where the inu-hanyou was in the middle of nowhere.

**With Sesshomaru's pack:**

The demon lord was on his way again this morning after a rest. The little human girl, Rin was on Ah-Un's back and Jaken following behind. Sesshomaru felt weird. Something wasn't right. There was no shouki in the air. Last night, the smell of shouki was very stink. It killed all the plants and destroyed the villages on its way and now the air was so fresh and pure.

Sesshomaru reached the meadow where the battle last night happened. He smelled the wind and saw what happened. But it didn't take his nose to guess. InuYasha's blood was everywhere and the faint scent of Naraku floated in sunlight. Sesshomaru raised his eyebrow and said to himself:

"This Sesshomaru don't believe that the half-breed could kill Naraku easily like that."

From what the plants and the smells told him, InuYasha was badly injured and he couldn't make it long. The demon lord knew exactly where the pack could go for this situation. He made his way to the village. A strange feeling bothered him. What was it? – Sesshomaru asked himself. The feeling of… lost?

A/N: What do you guys think? InuYasha's _not_ dead, okay? That's the only thing you need to know. He's the main character of the manga and anime! If it's not so intriguing then I can stop writing because it takes a lot of time to write and I have very few reviews!

Explanation:

- _Kosode_: is the garment that priestesses wear (Kikyou and Kaede's white blouses are _kosode_). Their red skirts are _nagabakama_.


	5. Decisions

Disclaim: InuYasha doesn't belong to me, but the content of this story does.

Okay, I get very few reviews here and it's getting frustrated. I'd post this chapter for the ones who reads my story whenever I post a chapter and gives me reviews. I hope you'll give me motivations to continue this story.

**Chapter 5: Decision**

**InuYasha's Point of View:**

It was all black, nothing else. I didn't hear, or smell and neither sense anything around me. The pain was fading, I felt dull. My body was frozen, I couldn't move. It was like some sort of invisible rope wrapping around my body. My brain didn't work so well. I so didn't want to think how my damn heart was doing. At least my demon blood was still under control, even my life was at risk. It was my human night, after all. I knew exactly where I was going since the f*cking Shikon no Tama forced me to make a wish. Death was waiting for me to give in. I knew that death was the only way out, the only solution for me to end the horrible agony I was suffering. But something held me back, like I said, giving up wasn't in my dictionary. I almost always meant what I said. Now I was nearly dead, but I still didn't know what I lived for. I didn't know what my purpose to live, which was truly pathetic of me…

I didn't know if my companions were trying to save my ass, but I didn't ask them to do that and I hoped that they wouldn't. Didn't they always scorn me for my manners and behaviors? I mostly wanted to die, but a small part of me hesitated. Why? I didn't know. I forced my brain to work, to seek for a reasonable answer. What was worth to live for?

"_InuYasha ni-chan, I need you right now and so does the other hanyous."_ Suddenly, Shiori's voice resounded in my mind. Was that it? Was it the cause of my hesitation? The words of that little bat hanyou affected me that much, didn't them? They _needed _me. She admitted it without any force. Most people took a long time considering and force to ask for my help and mostly because they didn't have other choice. Was it _that _simple? The desire to start a new life, to have a true family for once held me back to this world of misery. No – I told myself. It was simple, but it was something that I had never gained. It sounded simple but yet it wasn't. I remembered that I told the little bat hanyou that I'd join her after destroying Naraku and the Shikon no Tama, but now I wasn't able to fulfill that promise. Sadness filled my mind making my body numb. A shiver ran down my spine. If I had a second chance, I'd try my best not to blow it. But I didn't promise that it'd work out…

**The nameless hanyou's point of view:**

Yuki, Shiori and I reached the village. The others stayed miles away from it to make sure that no-one would notice us, not even powerful demons. The village was small, yet it was… filled of humans. I closed my eyes for a few seconds to compose myself. The scent of blood running in their veins was so tempting. I told myself I had passed this temptation long time ago and I wouldn't lose it. My throat was on fire because of the scent, but I ignored it easily. With my spiritual power, I sensed that the Shikon no Tama no long existed in this world and I was relieved. My ability allowed me to hear the souls' voices within the jewel and that drove me insane. I also sensed that there were three sources of spiritual power in the village. Without discovering, I knew immediately they were from the old miko who was living there, InuYasha and the young miko who travelled with him. InuYasha's spiritual power was very special, mix with his youki. My ears were focus. I listened hard and caught the sound of his faint heartbeats. He was really on the brink of death. The scent of death was in a small hut near the sacred tree. InuYasha was lying in there, no doubts. I scanned the areas. His companions were in that hut along with the old miko. I told Yuki and Shiori:

"Listen, you guys distract those people. I need about five minutes with him. Three days later, everything would be okay."

"What would you do in five minutes?" – asked Yuki warily.

"Drag him away from his current path." – I replied simply.

"Why does it take three days?" – asked Shiori curiously.

"It takes three days for his wounds to heal, his body to recover and him to gain his new form. He wouldn't be the exact hanyou like he is right now." – I said patiently.

"So he would have a different appearance?" – Yuki raised her eyebrow.

"No, his features would change a bit, but mostly, he'll look still the same." – I replied coolly. I had pictured his looking before he even transformed. I hoped he wouldn't regret if he chose to live. – "But I warn you, I only help when he wants me to, if he chose death, I wouldn't do anything."

"Alright, sure." – I received their shrugs. – "He decides what's best for him."

I gave them a nod and teleport to the back of the little hut where InuYasha was lying in. Closing my eyes, I checked the surrounding again and sensed a powerful youki. In my head, image of an inu-youkai was heading to the hut slowly. He must be InuYasha's half-brother. I told myself to be quick. Maybe I got less than five minutes but that wasn't the problem. About half a second later, I heard the villagers screamed:

"A lot of youkais are heading here! Run!"

My comrades must have lured some demons here to distract the villagers. I heard the mikos inside the hut said:

"Come on, we've got to help them!"

"But what about InuYasha?" – asked Miroku, the monk warily. – "Someone has to look after him."

"Don't worry about that baka. We have to protect the living first, pity the death later." – chirped Shippo, the little fox-demon.

"He's not dead!" – protested Sango, the demon slayer. – "Not after everything he's done."

"But we still have to save the village. He's a hanyou; he could hang in there a bit longer." – said Kaede, the old miko.

After that, all of them left the hut to battle the demons outside. Without hesitation, I got into the hut and the scent of InuYasha's blood entered my nostrils, tortured my self-control. But I wasn't easily distracted. Taking a deep breath, I sat on the bamboo bed next to the inu-hanyou. For a quarter second, I examined him. His demon blood blessed him a special beauty. Those dog-ears made him look special and the messy long silver hair was like moonlight. His eyes weren't open, but I knew that they were amber like sunlight. His skin was pale and lifeless. His heart was beating slowly and carefully, like it was hesitated that it should stop or keep beating. I put my hand on his cheek and rubbed it gently, transferred some energy from me to him. I could heal wounds and injuries in a blink of eye, but he was hurt badly and it was impossible. The energy I gave him was enough to bring him consciousness. InuYasha groaned lowly and opened his eyes.

**InuYasha's Point of View:**

It was dark but my senses started to come back. Not that I asked them to, but they just came, naturally. I felt energy came into my body, so comfortable and gentle, that I couldn't myself from groaning in comfort. It was hard to believe that my friends could tend my wounds. Was I in another world now? But the answer hit me immediately. I caught the scent that I'd never known before. It was so nice; better than anything I'd never smelled. It was a mixture of a meadow of herbs and flowers together. The smell repaired my brain and made me relax. It felt so _right_. I slowly opened my eyes and saw a girl sitting next to me. She wasn't a villager, and the scent of her blood told me that she wasn't human or demon. She had the same fate like me, being an outcast just because of her abnormal appearance. But the only things I saw were a pair of peaceful calm blue eyes and her black outfit. She wasn't Shiori, but I could tell that the bat-hanyou was her friend. Those eyes of the girl, made me trust her without talking. Yet I felt nothing was wrong with that, she was rubbing my cheek, gently and carefully like she was trying to wake me without hurting or startling me and I appreciated that. She spoke:

"InuYasha, you're on the brink of death now. Do you know that?" – said the girl calmly, like it wasn't a big deal. I liked that, too because she wasn't making things serious like we were already in my funeral.

I nodded and said:

"May I know who you are?"

"It doesn't matter who I am. I'm here to help, if you ask for it. Do you trust me?" – She asked me, her pretty blue eyes looked straight into my burning gold eyes, like she was trying to cool me down.

"The only one I doubt most is myself. I don't believe people because I don't trust myself to handle the facts." – I admitted bitterly.

"Then I guess if you ask for faith, I'll give you mine." – replied the girl gently. – "Like you can see, I'm a hanyou…"

"Then you should leave before the others come back and treat you like an animal." – I warned her sourly.

"I don't care about the treatments that people give us." – I interrupted her yet she didn't scold or lecture me. It felt nice. It was like she could see my soul by those eyes of her.

"Then why are you here?" – I asked, giving her a painful beam.

"Like I said, I'm here to help." – She explained patiently. Most people lost their patient talking to me. – "But it's your choice to accept it or not."

"Why do you want to help?" – I asked. I didn't doubt, but it was weird that someone offered me help without any negative emotions. Even my companions got frustrated because of the questions I asked whenever they offered me help.

I waited her to scold me and say something like "Of course I'd like to help you baka, because we're hanyous!" but instead of that, she gave me the kindest and warmest smile I'd never seen, even my mother never gave me that kind of smile. The only thing I got from my mother was her tears. But something bothered me about the smile of the strange girl. Her smile encouraged me, but her eyes were sad. It made me want to get rid of the sadness in those blue orbs and replaced it with happiness. She said:

"Everyone deserves a second chance, InuYasha. We don't know each other, but without asking, I know that life has never been kind with you. If you want to start over again, then I'll help you."

The way she said it, it felt like we were best friends for a long time already. I swallowed some air into my stomach to compose myself. She asked again:

"Now do you want to live or keep going the path you're in?"

"I've destroyed my greatest enemy and also the Shikon no Tama, but still, I have something to protect, to live for. I don't accept the fact that my life is never whole as it meant to be. Yes, I'd like to live, if it's possible." – I confessed. The words got out, and I didn't regret.

"Then InuYasha, I'd give you your wish, but also along with a warning." – said the girl sadly.

I know this was coming, everything came with a price. I asked:

"What would you want? I have nothing to give."

"I don't ask for anything, InuYasha. I just want to tell you that when I restore your life, it would be really painful. The pain would burn your body and at that moment, you might wish for death. Once I gave you my help, there is no turning back. You'd be… immortal." – The warning came out, clearly and seriously yet gently. She was giving me a choice. The hanyou didn't force me to do anything, not like Shiori did. But I didn't blame the bat hanyou. She was young, and she wanted me by her side, a new member in a new family.

"Everything comes with a price. I've already suffered for a long time, so it doesn't matter if I suffer a bit longer." – I gave her a smile, to express my gratefulness towards her for helping me, for saying those words to me.

"It would be two to three days long. Your companions would think that you're dead during the time you recover and might bury you, but don't worry, you'd get out the coffin easily once your transformation is completed." – said the girl in amuse. The part getting out of the coffin was very funny, and I giggled.

"What you're saying is that I'll be different, not the same as I am right now." – I translated her words.

Slowly, she nodded, her eyes were focus and some kind of private misery was formed in her eyes. My heart pounded, even it was beating slowly. Somehow, I felt like it was my fault. She said:

"You probably lost your memories. You probably won't remember your friends or anyone in this life. It's likely you would reborn but you still remember your name and identify; your special features and personalities." – Now her voice was deadly serious.

She paused and continued her speech:

"But you can prevent that by thinking of the important memories during the days you recover. Think of them and remember them. But the pain might stop you from doing that." – The girl was trying to help me understand the situation here. Something made me think that she was blaming herself for offering me help. – "But of course, you can decline my offer." – She returned to her calm state immediately when she added.

I considered about this for a few seconds. The memories of my friends, I didn't wish to have it. They were so painful and they were also my weaknesses. I knew that she had to leave soon, before my companions returned. I didn't want her to answer the questions that people would throw at her. The girl was from Shiori's group and I knew it. I couldn't believe that I'd have a second chance, but of course, the price was pain. It was quite fair. No pain no gain, right? I bit my lips and tasted my dry blood:

"Does it take a long time? I don't want my companions to see you."

"Is that a 'yes' to my offer?" – Her eyes narrowed.

I nodded, feeling my body was going numb again. Every movement was leading me to unconsciousness. She asked again:

"You know exactly what you are doing, don't you?" – It seemed like she doubted my choice. – "Are you sure?" – She made sure that I had a choice, a choice of my own.

"I want new experiences. The life you're talking about is completely new, and I want to have a chance to know it, to make things right, to know the purpose of my existence. There are a lot of things that I wanted to do but I didn't. I want to accept Shiori's invitation, to support her." – _And to get to know you, stranger. _– I added mutely inside my head. I was affected strongly by the way she talked and treated me. It was weird that she knew about me but I didn't know a thing about her. It wasn't fair for both sides. I was stunned at myself for thinking about those kinds of things in this state. The girl made me feel _alive_.

She was tense for a moment, a body was completely still. Silence ruled the hut while I slowly drifted into the realm of unconsciousness again. From my fade visions, I saw her used her claws to tear her smooth pale skin. The girl slowly approached my face and put her bleeding spot over my lips. I felt her sweet warm blood flowing into my throat. The taste of it was special, her youkai parent was not a typical youkai, I could tell. Her blood was sweet, despite the saltiness of it. My dry throat was satisfied with the taste of the liquid, and the smell of it was like a comfort to my bleeding nose. Her blood entered my body and suddenly, my heart started to beat strongly and deadly fast inside my chest. I felt like it wanted to get out of my body, it punched my chest violently but I told myself to lay still. I felt the absence of the girl. She had left the hut…

**No-one's Point of Views:**

The demons attacked the village was dead immediate when Sesshomaru showed up. Without a word, he ripped the demons into pieces. The demon lord eyed his half brother's companions. They looked okay to him, so that meant his brothers took all the "bullets". Sesshomaru somehow felt angry at this. He smelled the hanyou's blood coming from the hut of the old miko. The group of human immediately prepared their weapons to stop the demon lord. Sesshomaru said:

"I don't think that I have a chance to end that mongrel's life now. I'm surprised that you filthy are out here while he's nearly dead but yet he calls you his _friends_." – emphasized the last word. He gave them a smirk.

Kagome said:

"He's a hanyou yet he's better than you, Sesshomaru. He has killed Naraku before you could even touch your weapon!"

"That half-breed wasted his life for a group of disgrace and a disgusting bastard. That makes perfect sense." – smirked Sesshomaru.

The group hissed angrily at him, but they didn't dare to do anything. The demon lord was powerful, and without InuYasha, they couldn't fight him. But Sesshomaru paused and looked towards the hut. He could hear crazy heartbeats coming from his brother. Shippo, who was hiding behind Kiara, could hear the sound, too. The sound of a rushing heart, rushing to the end…

A/N: Do you want to know what happens next? Then give me reviews! The next chapter would be: "**Burning Flame**". I'll go on my vacation two weeks later so if you want to know what happens next fast, then there are better be 5 reviews or more. Or I think I'll post next chapter 1 or 2 months later…


	6. Burning Flame

Disclaim: InuYasha doesn't belong to me, but the content of this story does.

Thank you Tensa-Zangetsu102 and dreamer for your reviews.

_This chapter is written for Vanessa, my generous cousin. I hope we'll meet soon._

**Chapter 6: **Burning Flame

**Sesshomaru's Point of View:**

This Sesshomaru couldn't believe that I would come to a village of humans just because the half-breed was dying. But I didn't regret, however I was relieved because I arrived. It was weird that demons could choose this nasty place to attack. Someone must have lured them here, for a certain intention, but I didn't bother to find out. Talking to the mongrel's companions was extremely annoying. The look they gave me was nothing more than anger and disgust. They were foolish to let their emotions overcome themselves like that, and so was my disgusting half-brother.

I asked myself: _"What am I doing here?"_ I don't care if that hanyou died in a battle. He should have died long time ago for existing in this world. But a feeling kept bugging me. I wasn't sure how I really felt, because I never felt anything since my father's death. Did I pity the hanyou? Or I just found it satisfying to watch him dying? My keen ears heard the strange heartbeats coming from the hut and without any doubts, they came from the disgrace. At first, it beat really slowly, like it was ready to stop. But now it wanted to jump out of its place. I raised my eyebrow and slowly approached the small hut. The humans glanced at each other and followed. The little fox-demon chirped:

"The heartbeats of Inu Baka are so fast! Will he break down?"

"Don't say such thing, Shippo. He won't die." – The demon slayer gritted her teeth, trying to convince herself from the obvious fact.

"Is he transforming into youkai?" – asked the wench.

"No, he's injured too badly; I doubt that his youkai could do anything." – The monk shook his head harshly.

I kept silence. Was he wounded _that _badly? Could he be as damaged as father when he saved his ningen mother? When I stepped into the tiny hut, I saw it was much worse. He was a totally mess. His stinky blood caked on his wounds and dyed the Fire Rat kimono into dark red. His tanned skin turned pale lifelessly. I narrowed my eyes and recognized Tessaiga was pulsing next to InuYasha's hip. There were no mistakes, the half-breed was dying. Father's fang could feel that, too. The miko wench burst into tears and said between her sobs:

"Why did it end that way? Why can't we do something?"

The monk sighed heavily and stared at InuYasha. He mumbled:

"Gomen ne, InuYasha."

The fox demon's mocking face immediately vanished. He hissed:

"You're not joking? He can't die! He never dies! He won't!"

"It's not something that we can make a joke of, Shippo-chan. Does it look like a joke to you?" – The demon slayer growled seriously.

"But he always heals after every battle. He heals the fastest in all of us, and he always gains his strength back. This is InuYasha we talk about! He never…" – The little demon obvious thought this was a joke, and now he started crying. Huh, such a weak brat!

"No-one is unbreakable, Shippo-kun. We all know that this is going to happen. Every victory has to be paid by sacrifices, and sacrifices here are including lives." – said the old miko sadly. – "He chose to do this and no-one is to blame."

"But we underestimate him. We mistreated him most of the time, Kaede-sama. It takes quite a long time for me to realize that." – The monk admitted, while he stared at the ground.

"What? He was the one with ill manners, Miroku! What are you talking about?" – questioned the wench in confusion.

"Kagome-sama, you should have been the first one to know. You "sit" him too much; sometimes you do it without reasons. He must have felt bad about it so he gave up his life without second thought." – replied the monk, he was surprised at the miko's reaction.

"No, I did nothing wrong. We did nothing wrong. He's the one who always keeps distant and be rude." – protested the wench. It was such a dramatic conversation. Rin tugged my kimono gently and asked innocently:

"Sesshomaru-sama, why is InuYasha-sama dying?"

I remained speechless. She didn't need to know that.

"He has the right to be distant, Kagome-chan. He's a hanyou. He has a rough life. You can't expect him to get along with people like we do." – replied the demon slayer.

Suddenly, a "clank" cut them off. Everyone looked at InuYasha. Tessaiga had got out of the sash which was tying it. Everyone remained still; no-one moved a muscle. The hanyou just lied there lifelessly. His heartbeats were the only noise in the hut. Tessaiga had stopped pulsing. But something was spreading out from the hanyou's body, some sort of energy. The old miko squeaked:

"Spiritual power? How?"

So the energy was spiritual power. That explained why Tessaiga wanted to get away from InuYasha. He was unleashing spiritual power, and it would purify the sword if his power was strong enough. But why was he able to do that? Then, Tessaiga hung up above the hanyou, and slowly glowed. It was a creepy scene, like the blade wanted to slay its owner. InuYasha didn't express anything at all. The glowing light of the sword started to fade when it slowly vaporized. Everyone held their breaths and even I did. The noisy fox demon and even Jaken kept their mouths shut. The human's jaws dropped open: _Tessaiga and InuYasha had become one_.

**No-one's Point of View:**

Kaede, InuYasha's companions and Sesshomaru's pack had stayed in the village for two days to see if there were any changes from InuYasha. His heart beat like crazy all the time. The crazy phenomenon didn't bother them much. They believed that Tessaiga wanted to die with him. It couldn't protect him in his human night. Rin and Shippo met and talked to each other to lighten their mood. Sesshomaru just simply sat outside the hut and stared at it to detect anything unusual. He didn't know what to do because there was honestly nothing to do. Kagome and Sango had cleaned all the wounds on InuYasha's body. With their surprises, they did heal a bit so there was hope, but not enough. His skin was clean now, but he looked like a dead corpse. His heart had slowed down a bit and later reached to its last beat. It would never work again. It happened cruelly without hesitation. The girls cried for hours and their eyes were red like tomatoes. They couldn't prevent this from happening.

They made a small funeral and didn't invite a lot of people. There were no many people who'd like to go to a funeral of a hanyou. They just stood silently in front of InuYasha's body; everyone was speechless. They didn't dare to admit that they didn't really appreciate his accompany. They didn't know if the hanyou was kind enough to forgive them.

With the help of Miroku and Kaede, they managed to put the hanyou into a black casket. Miroku asked:  
"Do you think we should incinerate him?"

Hearing the question, the girls cried louder making the monk looked at Kaede for answer. She shook:

"Something tells me not to do that. A burial is enough."

Miroku nodded harshly while pulling the casket to its place, a small tomb near the sacred tree. Sesshomaru stayed quiet at the scene. He told himself mentally "_So I must have come here for his funeral, right? Too bad I wasn't the one who killed him._" The group surrounded the gravestone, carved their blessing on it: "_Rest in peace, InuYasha._"

But there was one thing that they didn't know. InuYasha wasn't resting at all. In fact, he was having quite a bloody fight, between his mind and his heart.

**InuYasha's Point of View:**

Since the hanyou girl's blood entered my body, I wanted to scream and struggle so badly. It was too **painful**, exactly like she had warned me. I had accepted the price and prepared myself for it, yet things were a bit more than my imagination. I tried my best to be still, to stay silence so my friends wouldn't freak out. Something told me that they must not touch me during this. My heart beat insanely to move the new blood to every part of my body. Without any explanation, I could tell that the girl's blood was very powerful and she must have been very careful when she fed me her blood because if she gave me more than necessary, I could be exploded. My organs were too dull to feel anything except the horrible pain. Her blood, it was like a flame, a real burning red flame. Once it went into me, it burnt everything, and boiled my own blood. I felt like my bones were shattering under this pressure. The flame was obstinate and I told myself that so was I. My stubbornness was fighting against the will to scream and shout. I locked myself in my mind, and growled mutely sealing my lips.

My body was screaming along with my inner mind, it wanted to get out, to give up, to _die_. I followed my instinct to keep my mouth completely shut and it was a hideous joke I was making. If I didn't scream or say anything, how could I tell anyone to finish me off? All I wanted right now was to die, to never have been born. The whole of my existence didn't outweigh this pain. It wasn't worth living through it for once more heartbeat. _Please let me die_. I begged even knowing that no-one would hear…

I started to feel some organs. The sensation came when suddenly, my pain was doubled. The parts which were damaged and broken were on fire. They connected and knitted together by the scorching fingers of the burning flame. The endless burn raged on. I knew that it was fixing my body while I was paying the price at the same time.

Soon, it felt like I'd gone from being tied to the stake as I burned, to _gripping _that stake to hold myself in the fire. I had just enough strength to life there unmoving while I was charred alive. I bound my teeth together tightly. I tried to distract myself from the terrifying sorrow. Motivations to move on were needed…

If I gave up now, I would disappoint someone. Who, exactly? Who was brave enough to expect anything from me, a hanyou? I reasoned with myself. The first image flashed. My mother's meek face with her silky long raven hair was always a comfort to me; she was holding and telling me to live, to survive. But she was dead… Could I grant her last wish? I wouldn't let her down, would I? Next image, a little girl with the almost the same appearance as me. Her innocent face, her tanned skin along with her bright violet eyes and cute white hair was important to me, too. Shiori, she needed me so did I dare to give up now? The smile of her lovely little lips was so adorable when I freed her from her bastard grandpa. It was something that I wanted to see daily, not just once like that. Other small images kept appearing and then going away. The voices of people calling my name in different tones and emotions made me remember who I was. The image of Sesshomaru, blasting me with his poisonous claws flashed quickly but the pain made me lose focus for a second. I realized that I was able to move, but I didn't do it. If I unlocked my teeth, I would lose it all. I would scream like a baby. I sought for comfort. Where could I find comfort? The feeling of my cheek being rubbed gently came back, it felt so nice. Who did that? My brain was between working and shutting down. I forced it to come out, who rubbed my cheek? I remembered something. A wonderful scent. Mixture of herbs and flowers, and the clearest was jasmine and lavender, also the smell of forests and leaves. WHO? I asked myself, again. I was slipping away, and I didn't allow myself to let go now. A pair of blue orbs staring at me in a friendly way, and they warm me up. The pain charred violently again, but I was able to ignore it. I needed to **know** and I must. The one who gave me second chance, who offered me help was… that girl! I felt like there was a ray of sunlight popped inside my mind. The hanyou girl, how could I be mindless enough to forget her? Just because the pain was burning me? No way, was I _that _weak? Hanyous were supposed to be strong, right?

Then the images faded quickly, even I tried to hold them back. They just slipped away. My mind was totally blank.

I was too focus I didn't recognize that the pain had changed. The fire had retreated from every part of my body now. I didn't feel anything for forty-fifth second and the fire flared up in the center of my chest, sucking the last remnants of the flames from the rest of my body to fuel the most scorching blaze yet. The pain was enough to stun me, to break through my iron grip on the stake. My back arched, bowed as if the fire was dragging me upward by my heart. It became a clear battle inside me – my sprinting heart racing against the attacking fire. Both were losing. The fire was doomed, having consumed everything that was combustible; my heart galloped toward its last beat.

The fire constricted, concentrating inside that one remaining organ with a final, unbearable surge. The surge was answered by a deep, hollow-sounding thud. My heart stuttered twice, and then thudded quietly just once more. My heart beat its last beat so carefully, so categorically.

In a sudden, my senses came back at a time. My ears twitched; then I moved my fingers and toes. Taking a deep breath, I opened my eyes.

_A/N: What do you think about this? I tried to describe InuYasha's transformation with everything I have and I hope you can picture it. I hope you guys still like my story. Give me reviews, okay?_


	7. A new me

Disclaim: InuYasha doesn't belong to me, but the content of this story does.

Thank you Tensa-Zangetsu102 for your review.

To Sola05: Don't try to guess because the result might disappoint you. Thank you for reading my story. InuYasha would be similar to a vampire, yes, but I won't make it that way. No, he won't be a vampire, but a different kind of creature. This creature came from my imagination, with a little mix of vampires' features! I hope you'll enjoy the idea.

Oh, and I think I'll let this story happened somewhere in _InuYasha the Final Act_.

_This chapter is for Anita, my dear friend. It's one of my birthday presents for you._

**Chapter 7: **A different me

**InuYasha's Point of View:**

The dark gently hit my eyes. Everything felt so… soothing. I guess the flame had taken away my ability to feel pain. My mind was blank. I tried to define my position. This place was dark, and I was lying in a small room. My nose caught the smell of wet dirt and I heard the whispers of worms and insects. I figured it out that I was underground. People must have thought I was dead. Well, I lied still like a dead corpse for at least a few days, didn't I? My brain worked fast yet it didn't take a lot of energy to do that. I considered everything in one tenth second. If my ears weren't that keen, I would have thought it was completely quiet but no. I could feel the movements of microscopic creatures around me. My senses were sensitive enough to detect everything that was miles away. I felt energy filled my body.

I sniffed my garments and smelled my own blood. It smelled sticky; I didn't clean myself since… I didn't remember. No memories were in my mind. I tried to focus to remember something. It didn't take so long. My name, it was InuYasha and I was a hanyou. But right now, I wasn't sure if I was still a hanyou. My senses were way better and sharper than hanyous' senses were supposed to be. But the girl that… Wait a second, that girl! The hanyou girl, if she was a hanyou, then I must be one, too. I mean, her blood ran in my veins now. When her blood travelled around my body, it burned everything on its way or more specifically, it fixed everything by breaking them and recreating them. She must be a very powerful hanyou and I appreciated her for saving me. The images of her charming eyes, her beautiful voice and her gentle touches came back. They were blurred, but yet I was sure that they were real, very real. I knew another young female hanyou, named Shiori. She needed me to be her companion, to be in her new pack. The memories of her were even more blurred than the ones about my strange savior. Her innocent face along with her caring words for me was something that I remembered most. What else must I remember? I was son of princess Izayoi. My childhood was suck. People treated me like dirt. And that was all I remembered. There was a blank space in my memory, but I couldn't figure it out how to fill it, but I guessed it didn't matter. I wished to start over again, to make things right, to have another chance so I wouldn't stuck myself in the past now. Now I could only move on…

I asked myself what to do next. Finding the strange hanyou girl was the first in my list of top-things-to-do. And if I wanted to do that, I would have to get out of here. I was lying in a wooden casket. Then I guessed it wouldn't be hard to break out. Forcing all my strength to my claws and legs, I prepared myself to be ready. I hit along with kicking the lid and it cracked. I was surprised that I had damaged it only with my first shot. Then I concluded that I didn't need to unleash much energy for this and I should save my strength for something more useful. With an attempt to finish this in a simple way, I raised my claws and mumbled: "Blades of Blood". But the power came out wasn't red as it used to be or as I expected it to be. It was something very pure and powerful, enough to create a small explosion, break the casket and remove all the dirt which was surrounding the casket. My old attack had become something extraordinary. I had just stricken some sort of dazzling sharp white light of power with my claws just by making a small move. I told myself to be careful with my new body. No accidents should be made. Slowly, I stood up and waited for anyone to scream because they saw a corpse rising from the ground, but no. Everything was consumed in darkness of the night. But with me, it wasn't really dark. Everything was perfectly clear; I could see every single dust in the air. Everyone must be sleeping right now and no-one was outside to witness the scene I just created and I thanked goodness for that.

My eyes scanned the area. A big old tree hit my eyes. My grave was near it and there must be a reason. I glanced at the gravestone and saw: _"Rest in peace, InuYasha"_. Whoever dug my tomb must have been my friend. I smelled tears on my grave and raised my eyebrow. It was hard to find anyone who would shed tears for a hanyou. My childhood was a proof for my statement. I shook my head, reminding myself that it was none of my business. If I didn't remember any of it, I must have wished that I would be able to forget and there was no way I would try to force it into my mind.

My skin felt the gentleness of moonlight shining on me. I widened my eyes at my skin. It looked remarkable. I remembered my savior's skin when she tore it to give me her blood. She had beautiful smooth pale skin. Her appearance was very demonic but yet however velvet. The hanyou girl looked like a perfect living sculpture. And now, I noticed that my skin looked almost the same as hers. There was still a little fainting creamy pink along with the pearly paleness. It made myself looked unique, but I bet that my new look couldn't be compared to my savior's charm. I was just simply different. I was less demonic and mysterious than her, and I was livelier than her. I touched my skin and felt my internal organs. It was very weird. My temperature had changed for sure, my old warmth wasn't there. The fire must have changed mostly everything. I could still feel the existence of my blood inside my frozen veins. A stun came across me for one tenth second and I remained calm almost immediately. My veins were frozen like ice now, after the burning flame ran across them. The fire hadn't turned things into ash, but it froze everything inside me except my blood. That explained the faint creamy pink of my skin. The next thing I checked was my heart. I put my hand on my chest and waited, but the thing I expected never came. My frozen heart wasn't working anymore. Suddenly, her voice rang inside my mind: "_You'd be… immortal_". Everything of me was frozen in time, and I would never _age _again, was that what she meant? A bit of sadness swept over me, but I pushed it away. I chose this, and I wouldn't regret my own choice. I stood there for a while, listening to the conversation between the wind and the trees.

Suddenly, I reminded myself to hide my trace or people would find out a corpse had left its position. In a blink, I put the casket back in the tomb and cover it in dirt. Finishing a work in a few seconds, it was very stunning. My advanced speed made I felt like flying while I was doing my work. Things had become very easy and light to me. It was very exciting. A new feeling came. I could see the first sign of the sun coming from the horizon. Weak light started to dye clouds into pink and light red, a lovely romantic color. It was obvious that only my "unusual" senses could detect those tiny changes. I mean, I could see every single dust in the air at midnight! Creatures turned over in their deep slumber, their blunt senses could feel a bit that a new day was on its way. I sniffed the air to know more interesting smells that I couldn't catch with my weak senses in my previous life. My nose wrinkled as it caught the smell of my own garments. My scent wasn't really sweet. The scent of death covered my body, and the dirty stains of blood and dirt had tainted my _haori _along with my _hakama_. I barely remembered that my outfit had a name, but it didn't matter. I needed some new garments and the old ones shall be burnt. I wanted my past to be completely left behind, and that meant no mementoes should be kept. The youkais and ningens who happened to know me and witnessed my death shouldn't know about my reborn, I told myself this. What mattered now was the present. It would decide my new future.

With my amazing new speed, I "dropped in" some villages that had clothes and dressing material. I knew that they wouldn't have anything that fitted my size, so I had to sew them myself. When the hanyou girl offered me help, I remembered some small details of her outfit. Her clothes were all black. It was obvious that she didn't want the others to see her full appearance. The only things I saw were her eyes and her skin. The girl wore a black _kosode _with hood covering her head. Her face was hidden in the shadow that the hood created. It was very wise of her. I didn't take a clear look on her _nagabakama_, but I bet it was black, too. There must be a reason that she hid her appearance like that. And now, I had become something like her, I guessed I better not show my body off too much (even how nice it was).

Going around the village, I quickly chose two big smooth thick clothes, one was black and the other was white. Examining my old garments carefully, I tore the clothes I'd just taken. I was surprised at myself when I found out how deft I had been. My moves were a hundred percent accurate whenever I struck. Holding the needle as gently as possible (I might break it with my new strength), I threaded it without even looking and sewed the pieces of clothes together with an unbelievable speed. With the white cloth, I made three white _kosode _to wear inside just in case one of them ragged. The _hakama,_ _haori_, sleeves and _obi _were all black. For some reasons, I added a hood for the black _kosode_. Finishing my work, I spent one minute to admire my skills. I was a completely different creature from my old self, yet I felt so _me_. Folding my production neatly, I tracked down the offspring nearby and prepared to clean myself.

On the way, I recognized that half of the sun was on the horizon now. The farmers woke up early from their sleep were about to get on their fields again, but most people was still asleep. Fog hugged the mountains and fields with its gentle arms. The air was pure and cool. Everything seemed to revive from the coldness and dark of night. For a second, I was a bit sad to see how things changed quickly and reminded myself that time had no affects with me anymore. I reached the offspring before I knew it. It was nearly dawn, so the water would be cold enough to freeze ningens and minor youkais. But with my skin, I doubted that anything could freeze me. Putting my new garments on the bank of the offspring and taking out my old garments, I got into the water and washed myself quickly. I felt nothing when the water touched my skin. The air was exactly the same as the water to me now. In attempt to answer my question, I drank a small sip of water. The liquid ran down my throat and I was glad that I felt something and recognized its presence. Somehow, my throat was satisfied and I drank more water. Laughing lowly, I stopped almost immediately. I thought it was someone nearby made that laugh, but after one fourth second, I knew for sure that it came from me. I sounded like a complete stranger. Without talking for a few hours, I didn't know if my voice had changed. My ear could detect the sweet taste of my voice. It wasn't shrill and rough like before, but soft and smooth like silk. But my savior's voice had more attraction than mine, and her words were so convincing and comforting. My voice was quite similar to hers now. But her voice was also deep and sweet like music pouring into the listeners' ears. I got out of the water and dried myself while thinking all those things yet I didn't screw up anything.

My new garments fitted me and I wasn't surprised. When I sewed them, I just _knew_. Putting the spare white _kosode _into my _haori_, I glanced at the surface of water for one last time. It was weird that it didn't lose its purity after I cleaned myself. That was when I was totally frozen. The reflection of my own face on the surface of water hit my eyes. I succeeded stopping my jaws to drop open. My face, every line was perfect. The water wasn't clear as mirrors, but my eyes allowed me to see a clear vision. My hair was silky and long, hugging my back. Its color was platinum silver; it seemed to glow under sunlight. It looked stunning. My forehead was smooth with a dark little blue crescent could be seen beneath my bangs. I raised my eyebrow at this new feature. Why did I have it? Was I meant to have it but my human stopped it from showing up? I didn't remember any youkai members in my family so I couldn't know for sure. But something smashed my vision. Those eyes! Those eyes which were staring back at me! They were terrifying red. Its color looked like blood, sparking like some kind of jewel. I swallowed some air to calm myself down. Would my eyes be like that _forever_? But wait her eyes were sea blue, the girl who gave me this form. I quickly jumped to the final conclusion that there was a way to change my eye color and mild joy filled my soul. Silliness came along with joy, why did I care about such thing like how terrifying my eyes looked? Shaking my head lightly, I chuckled lightly at my own stupidity. My chuckled rang in the air, amazed my own ears…

Without any clear destinations in my mind, I just walked, but it felt more like I was gliding on the ground. I didn't put on my hood to cover my face, because I decided that there weren't any troubles _yet _if anyone saw me. Following different scents, I tried to track down Shiori. She needed to know that I was ready to join her…

**Sesshomaru's Point of View:**

After the mongrel's boring funeral, I planned to back on my way again. Rin was saying goodbye while Jaken had already been by my side. For the last time, I glanced at the half-breed's gravestone. It was hard to believe that he died so easily like that, in a sudden. His pathetic companions talked over and over again how he destroyed the Shikon no Tama. InuYasha must be a very big fool to stab himself with a purify arrow of a miko. Why had father wasted his blood for such creature like that? But while I thought all of this, something ached inside me, that feeling I had since I arrived at this village. I hated my filthy half-brother, yet I couldn't stand the fact that I would never see his immature fighting styles again, or the glares of hatred that he always sent me whenever we saw each other, or hear the swears and rude words he blasted towards me, or see the way he raised Tessaiga and hear his cries of joy when he won a battle, or anything similar to that again. What I missed most was when he screamed my name with disrespect but filled of wariness and concern, at the moment Magatsuhi's tentacles tried to absorb me. I didn't know why I even cared, but something important was lost.

While thinking of those things, my eyes didn't leave his gravestone. It had changed after a night. I didn't know _what _had changed, but I was sure that something was different. The dirt on it, and my eyes caught a single footprint on the ground. I raised my eyebrow at this weird trace. Someone had been there and hidden their tracks very well, but still left behind some mistakes. I hadn't seen any creatures with just one leg yet. The footprint was too big for a human's and from my point of view; _InuYasha's _foot would probably fit that print. I didn't catch his scent in the air. I let out a breath that I didn't know I was holding. No, it was impossible but yet I believed in it. InuYasha was **not **dead.

A/N: So my vacation had started. I wouldn't post anything in three weeks or maybe less. Reviews, please!


	8. Complications

Disclaim: InuYasha doesn't belong to me, but the content of this story does.

Thank you Tensa-Zangetsu108 and Yami-Bakura1998 for your reviews.

**Chapter 8: **Complication

**The InuYasha's Point of View:**

After 200 years of being covered by invisible fog, I found out that I could finally break free. Things were crystal clear. Everything of this world seemed to have a distance with me. I knew stuff that I didn't even know I had. I could feel a connection with another world, too. My strange savior was definitely _not _an ordinary hanyou and I certainly had become something like that. The desire to discover made me feel excited, a feeling I was sure that I'd never had before. How many more experiences was I going to have? How many did I need? But like I knew, I was _immortal_, which meant time would never affect me. I had eternity, something that very less creatures had. If I could live forever, what would I live for?

The sun was on top of the mountains, shining gently in the blue sky. Little sunlight touched my skin and I felt myself shining and _sparkling _along with the sun. With my new temperature, the weather was nothing. I could be always comfortable. But rule of life was: "_Every creature has a weakness_" so I had to find out mine soon enough before anyone else knew it. In order to do that, my stranger needed to be found. I glided gracefully on wet dirt; my bare feet barely touched the ground. In the other's sight, I guessed I looked like some sort of ghost but I didn't spare my mind to care what the others thought. My face was uncovered, but it would soon be if I didn't want any troubles. I quickly left the areas of humans and reached the forest. The familiar smells entered my nostrils, making me relax. I felt like I'd not been here for years. The memories of my previous life were blurred. The only thing I knew was that my weak senses couldn't catch total features of the forest. And now, I could even hear the sound of dirt touching the ground. The conversations between animals and plants were interesting. I wondered how demons and humans thought that other creatures couldn't feel, couldn't think or couldn't do things like they could. They certainly could, and even more than that. I noticed that other animals wished to approach me, but they hesitated. It was quite a phenomenon. They were supposed to be alert and scared. My eyes swept the bushes and tree canopies around me. Little orbs were staring at me with wonder. Their noses sniffed the air carefully with something like awe. I took a full breath and tried to know what they smelled. My scent, it had changed and I didn't recognize. How could I be so mindless? Knowing things about the others but I didn't know myself clearly enough. My savior's scent was like all flowers combined, but mostly was jasmines, roses, lavender and perhaps some herbs. She could attract anyone and anything with that smell for sure. It brought comfort. I didn't smell like that, but my scent wasn't bad. It was a mixture of the smell of pure water (maybe from the hot spring), sunlight, lilac and perhaps lily (or bellflower). I was totally stunning. A small beam formed on my lips. The other animals kept following me until I was nearly out of the forest.

Peacefulness ruled the land. I followed the faint scent of Shiori that I barely remembered. My mind didn't make up the destination, but I just followed my hunch and let my instincts in charge. Full focus wasn't needed for any activities. I was slightly worried. Wherever I went in the past, troubles followed me. Something told me that it would never change because of two seasons. First, I was a hanyou. The second one was I enjoyed helping people, so their problems would soon become mine. I told myself that I shouldn't live the way I did. But old habits die hard, my human blood wasn't frozen. It was still in me, in those icy veins. My hatred towards human increased, but I didn't how much it did. I detested demons since I was a mere hanyou, and I guessed that hatred couldn't grow any bigger, so it stayed the same, almost. With new abilities and energy inside me, I knew that I could tear anything into pieces in no time. Suddenly, all my senses stayed focus on one thing. My ears listened hard and my eyes narrowed. I smelled blood. There were no mistakes that it was a mixture of demon and human's blood. A hanyou. I darted to the battle in a blink. The screams, growls, clashes were loud. It was a small fight, to me. I'd been through worse, but I didn't remember exactly. Even it wasn't big, I guessed the little one needed a helping hand. Reaching the place, I saw the person I was looking for: _Shiori_. She had a new crystal ball that helped her to create barriers and fought. The little one did injure her enemy a bit, but she was wounded way more badly. Her blood was on the leaves, the barks of trees and also on the ground. Her cute face was twisted in anger and exhaustion. That reminded me of myself in the past, and it wasn't a wise way to fight. I jumped up for the first time after the transformation and felt myself flying high. My body wasn't heavy like it was used to. It seemed like I had carried a heavy bag for my whole life and now it was gone. Raising my claws, I unleashed the white energy that I did earlier. The demon vaporized without even said anything. Shiori breathed fast and heavily. I quickly got to her side and said:

"Hang in there, Shiori. You'll be fine."

Even I was panic a bit, but my voice was still soothing. In a lightning speed, I carried her to a small lake, cleaned her wounds and stopped the bleeding by dressing her wounds with my spare clothes. It only took a few minutes and I was amazed by myself. Shiori sat in front of a tree trunk and rested her back on its bark. She looked at me, her violet eyes were focus. I immediately recognized that she might not realize me because of my new appearance.

"Shiori, it's me. I'm…"

"InuYasha ni-chan, it's nice to see you in a better form and better health." – she cut me off and stared at me in a friendly way. – "And thanks for helping me."

I raised my eyebrow. She knew, so it was obvious that my savior was with her, too. I rubbed her little cheeks gently and smiled:

"It's nothing. I'm ready to join you, sis."

Her innocent face turned naïve. She looked so darn cute. Then she gave me a huge warm grin. Shiori squeaked:

"Really? That's so great!"

"Yeah, I'm glad you still want me even my appearance looked terrifying a bit." – I said, examining her emotions. There was nothing else but joy.

"What? You're still InuYasha to me. You always were, you always are and you'll always be!" – She chirped happily. – "Those beads on your neck, do you know what it is?" – she pointed at the purple necklace. I didn't notice it.

"I don't remember what it is." – It felt so dumb when I said that.

"It has some kind of purification power on it. I think we could remove it if you wish." – She said seriously. I nodded and said "Sure, I feel like I've wanted it out for so long."

"What about your friends?" – suddenly Shiori nervously.

Then dead silence. The "friends" word was so… weird but yet also familiar. Seeing her worried face, I played with her hair and asked:

"What friends?"

She stayed quiet, stared at me with wide eyes. I must have forgotten whatever she knew. Then Shiori smiled again like it didn't happen. She said:

"Nothing, InuYasha ni-chan. I just want to make sure that you don't have any regrets joining me and you don't have better friends than me." – She gave me an adorable pout and I giggled.

"Who would be a better friend for a hanyou than a hanyou?" – I asked, raising my eyebrow.

"You're definitely right. We have to stick together. Let's go to our home, shall we?" – asked Shiori. The word "home" sounded so tempting.

"Right, let's go! I don't think I can wait any longer!" – I replied while taking her hand then we headed to our home, _my new home_.

**Sesshomaru's Point of view:**

The single footprint on the ground haunted me; even I was already on my way. Rin and Jaken were fighting again about some silly issues, but I wasn't paying full attention. In the end, I just gave Jaken a small growl and victory certainly belonged to little Rin. I was never tired of my little companions, but sometimes I was annoyed of Jaken. He was very talkative and that just broke my favorite silence. However, I liked Rin's special humming songs, they made life more interesting. Looking at her, I beamed inside my mind. Such a cute kind child she was. But someday, she would no longer be the little girl who would always follow me. She had told Jaken and other demons and humans that she'd like to be with me, forever. I doubted that she knew what she was talking, but it was very weird that deep inside me, I knew she meant what she said. Rin could do anything, who knows? She brought lots of surprises and did amazing things to warm people's hearts, including mine…

This Sesshomaru was heading to InuYasha's hiding places. I didn't know why I did that, but I still wanted to make sure the fact. It was hard to believe the hot-tempered, stubborn, bold and stupid hanyou was dead. It bugged me that I couldn't stand the fact! I should be happy because the dirty stain of my family was gone, forever. But no, whenever I thought that, things got worse. A kind of sharp rock blocked my throat and made me want to break down. InuYasha's scent was nowhere to be found in the air, but there were plenty of ways to hide his scent. All I smelled was a very intriguing perfume of flowers. I tried to make out what they were and I guessed it was a mixture of lilac, bellflower and maybe some other stuff. The scent was very faint. Whatever had that scent, must be a very pure creature. The smell was flawless, I could tell and there was no way it belonged to mere flowers. I raised my eyebrow and huffed myself. Even in my wildest dream, the half-breed couldn't have scent like that. But it made sense that if he wasn't dead, the scent belonged to him. No other scents were detected, that was the only thing that went around here at dawn. No humans or demons would smell like this, or would be so near a human village. I reached the hot spring and stopped. Someone was there, cleaning themselves. I asked myself, if I woke up and found myself in a casket, what would I do? First, I got out of there. I smelt dried blood and dirt on my garments; of course I would clean myself after that. So, he could do the same. The question was why didn't he tell his friends to cheer them up, or to surprise them? Things were unclear. There were no tracks, no traces, nothing. It was like the creature moved without touching anything, but it didn't fly. No broken branches or fallen leaves because of damage were found. It looked like it could glide. I followed the faint scent…

Something hit me. Tessaiga had become one with InuYasha, so was it possible that he would absorb the sword's youki and power? This meant he wasn't so weak if he survived. My brain didn't work so well. The clues I saw weren't enough for anything to make sense. If anything involving swords, Totosai was the only answer. Glancing at my companions, I told them:

"Stay here. Jaken, look after Rin."

"Yes, Sesshomaru-sama." – bowed Jaken with a hint of fear on his green face.

"Come back soon, my Lord!" – shouted Rin, waving her little hand.

I gave them a small nod and launched myself into the air. In no time, I was near Totosai's place. I smelt human in his cave. Raising my eyebrow, I prepared myself to land. What human would ask Totosai for a weapon? In my sight, I saw a little boy with tanned skin and a ponytail at the back of his head. So it was the little boy who used to be enslaved by Naraku, the demon slayer's little otoutou. Thinking of _otoutou_, my heart writhed in some kind of… pain. I must have gone crazy. I heard Totosai:

"Kohaku-kun, why do you need so many weapons like this?"

"Totosai-sama, just give them to me. This is an urgent situation and I don't want any discussion here. I appreciate your work very much so please be hurry." – replied Kohaku urgently, just like his words. It looked like he was in a rush.

"How much time do I have left?" – Totosai raised his eyebrow.

"About half an hour, I think. Please, Totosai-sama, concentrate on your work!" – replied the boy seriously.

"Okay, okay, you'll have them in half an hour."

I stepped in the cave, and Totosai's cow gave me a horror shriek. Immediately, the little demon slayer and the blacksmith turned to my direction. Totosai squeaked:

"What are you here for, Sesshomaru?"

"Good morning, Sesshomaru-sama." – said the boy politely while bowing his head. I liked his reaction more than the blacksmith's.

"I have a question for you, but I can be patient so just finish your current work." – I gave him a blank answer while sitting on a rock across from the little ningen.

The boy wasn't tense with my presence and I was a bit surprised. Well, I guessed his job could keep himself calm around demons. His eyes were focus, like something was haunting him. The boy tapped his foot on the ground and that reminded me of InuYasha. I wanted to tell him to stop doing that annoying thing, but no words got out of my throat. Suddenly, his eyes met mine and he said:

"I'm sorry, am I bothering you with the tapping foot thing?"

I was stunned. Could he read minds or something? I gave him an uncomfortable frown and he stopped tapping his foot. He gave me a small smile and shrugged:

"You're staring at my foot like it's your enemy so I just know."

I was? Why was I so distracted? Snapped myself from my own trance, I looked at other direction. A dove flew in the cave and gently landed on Kohaku's shoulder. Its feathers were special. The little boy stared at the bird's black eyes and sighed heavily. He mumbled so the others couldn't hear but unluckily for him, I wasn't a mere youkai:

"Tell them that the weapons shall be done soon. And the new member of our group is coming, so they shouldn't be so anxious about this little fight. I bet that he's almost as powerful as his savior. After all, nee-chan said that she would transform him into something like herself."

The bird flew away after the message. I was confused. His _group _would have a new member? Since when did this little monster have a group? And the nee-chan he was talking about was definitely not the demon slayer in my half-brother's pack. Curiosity consumed me; I wanted to know what this boy was up to. But first, I asked Totosai what I wanted to know first, and then I would take care of my curiosity. Seeing my distracted face, the ningen boy was anxious and thoughtful. He stared at the flame that the blacksmith was using to create a bunch of daggers and swords. After a deadly quiet half hour, Totosai finished making total fifty daggers, ten swords, countless sickles and chains. I raised my eyebrow. Those weapons were enough for a small army. Kohaku quickly used the biggest chain to tie everything into a huge bundle and put it on his back. Totosai asked warily:

"Are you sure you can carry all of them?"

"Don't worry, Totosai-sama. I can manage them. Thanks for your help. I'll pay you a visit soon."

With that, the boy jumped out of the cavern. Totosai slowly turned to me, he was nervous, like he was every time I met him. Of course, I was Lord of the Western Lands so it was obvious that people were scared of me, except Rin. Even I ripped my enemies into pieces in front of her face; she wouldn't say a word about it and continue travelling with me. The blacksmith asked:

"What can I do for you, Sesshomaru? I don't think you're here for weapons."

"The boy, did he tell you what are all those weapons for?" – I asked sternly, with a business-like tone.

"No, he just said there's an emergency situation. Kohaku's been here a lot lately, he looks happier. He said he wasn't under Naraku's control anymore and he has new friends." – said Totosai calmly while scratching his head. The three-eye cow was licking his garment.

"What kind of friends?" – I raised my eyebrow. I didn't think it was _that _easy to trust a boy who used to be Naraku's slave.

"Hah, I can't tell. That pale little scary girl still followed him. You know, the girl with the mirror. She used to be emotionless and hollow, but now she smiled and talked a lot. Kohaku even asked me where to buy a good kimono for her." – Totosai rolled his eyes.

I tried to absorb his words. _The pale little scary girl with a mirror _was Kanna, Naraku's reincarnation. I couldn't imagine what would be like if that girl smiled and talked like an ordinary girl. I started to get into the real purpose I was here for. I said:

"Naraku's dead. The Shikon no Tama is destroyed. It's over."

"Oh, no wonder those two kids look so relieved. God blesses them." – Totosai nodded his head. – "So, did you do that?"

"I wish I did. Unfortunately, the disgusting half-breed achieved that feat." – I replied sarcastically.

"That reckless InuYasha? So he meant it when he said it." – Totosai squeaked surprisingly.

"What did he say?" – questioned me. It was getting interesting.

"Huh, you know that hanyou. He said that he would defeat Naraku by his own hands and destroy the Shikon no Tama if it's the last thing he does in his life." – answered Totosai. He didn't know the meaning of the last words.

"Souka. It _was _the last thing he did in his life." – I emphasized the word _was_.

"What do you mean?" – asked Totosai with wide panic eyes.

"He's dead. He did all of that in his human night." – answered me emotionlessly.

"Is that what you're here for? To tell me the news?" – Totosai said sadly.

"His pack has already buried him. But before his heart stopped beating, Tessaiga glowed and became a part of him."

"What?" – said the blacksmith, his eyes narrowed.

"At first, I thought the sword's youki would save his sorry life, but it seemed like it didn't work." – I gave him a shrug.

"You want to know what that means. But I can't give you the answer, Sesshomaru. I'm sorry but I have no idea." – Totosai said anxiously, he really was clueless. I was quite disappointed.

"Alright then, looks like I have to ask the tree about that." – I stood up, prepared for my leave.

"Sesshomaru, how do you feel?" – asked the blacksmith warily. What did he mean when he asked this Sesshomaru such question?

"Nothing." – was all my answer. But it was… a lie.

A/N: Internet connection is suck. Hope you guys like this. Give me reviews, will you?


	9. Tragic past & glorious future

Disclaim: InuYasha doesn't belong to me, but the content of this story does.

_To Rosie, my impetuous mother. I want you to know that grandparents didn't kill me yet. I'm still healthy enough to update my story._

Thank you Tensa-Zangetsu105 and YamiBakura1998 for your reviews, I really appreciate them. To all those who reads but don't review, I'd like to say thank you, too.

**Chapter 9: **Tragic past and glorious future

**InuYasha's Point of View:**

Heading to our destination, Shiori was like New Year had come earlier this year. It was hard to believe that someone cherished me this much since my mother's death. Well, I wasn't sure, maybe there was someone else, but old memories blurred. Besides, I chose to _not _remember them, so which meant things were pretty nasty. On the way, we crossed lots of forests but very few fields and villages. I realized that wherever we were going to, the place must be hidden very carefully. Shiori looked at me and smiled gently. My new eyes helped me to see every line of her face. She was cute and the others must be damn cruel to avoid her. Her reactions were fast and mature for a child. I felt sorry that she had to face a bunch of crazy things already even she wasn't a teenager yet. But my mind told me that I'd been through the same, even worse because I was a different kind of hanyou, and I surly didn't remember that what kind of hanyou was that.

The forests we passed looked beautiful. They really did know how to choose a hiding place for a crowded group. The birds sang beautiful songs with little crickets twanged their violins noisily and all of that created a unique piece of music. I bet that only my savior and I could be able to enjoy this (or even recognize it to begin with). The sky was blue and with me, the sun was like a gentle light yellow ball floating dreamingly at the middle of the sky, promising an extraordinary day. I saw dust flying around, resting on everything that it landed on and even the animals with sharpest senses couldn't feel it. Shiori held my hand tightly and walked quickly through the place. She didn't want followers and neither did I. Every secret would be exposed some day, but we had to make sure that it wouldn't harm us. The young hanyou eyed the forest warily but her face was calm. She was unsure if there was anyone around. Her instincts weren't sharp enough. I reassured her gently:

"Shiori-chan, there's no-one around."

"What? Of course there isn't!" – replied her nervously. I gave her a small beam.

With that, we continued our journey to an enormous mountain. I smelled a familiar scent coming from the mountain. It wasn't the smell of my savior, but someone else's. It might be someone that I knew from my past. I felt unclear, I couldn't be sure. My mind could even detect a weird existence of a hanyou. The creature didn't have demonic aura or any smells or scents. But I could feel the person's emotions, sense the joy and movements coming from him/her. There as another scent, coming from a ningen. He smelled like woods and metal. Shiori smiled:

"Someone is here to welcome us. You might know them before, but you don't remember."

"Oh, I didn't know that there's a human at your place." – I gave her my fake confused face.

"Ah, you know him, too. He's young and he's immortal. People treat him no better than they treat him. He has a harsh past and he's trying to find a new beginning like you." – chirped Shiori.

"Poor him, it must be hard." – I shook my head lightly at the thought a ningen was being abandoned by his very kind in such a young age.

"Yes, InuYasha-sama, but it won't matter anymore since there's someone else that always accepts me." – A voice reached my ears. From my senses, I noticed that he was quite far from me.

"Do you hear him?" – I asked Shiori curiously if she knew someone was talking.

"I do know that there's a voice coming from somewhere, but I'm not sure what that person is talking exactly." – She laughed playfully. She surly knew who that was even she didn't hear clearly what he said.

"He knows me. That's quite rude of me for not remembering him. And how could he hear me in such a distance? No humans could do that." – I raised my eyebrow.

"You'll find out just about now. Be patient. And don't worry, you'll remember him." – Shiori squeezed my hand.

I nodded my head while heading to the source of the voice. Shiori beamed during that time. Behind a thick fog that was surrounded around the mountain, I saw two kids. One was a boy and the other was a girl. The boy must be a youkai taijiya. I could tell that from the weapons tying next to his hip and his outfit. He was about twelve years old. His skin was tanned like hanyou's skin, which was amazing. His eyes were warm and brown. His dark brown hair was tied into a small ponytail at the back of his head. The boy looked kind and honest from the look of his face. The smile on his face was welcoming and friendly. His companion, who was standing next to him, was a little girl that looked like an eight-year-old hanyou. She had a very unique appearance. Her outfit and hair was pure white. Her hair was smooth and long, it was even whiter than my hair. Her black eyes were supposed to be cold, but the smile of her lips warmed the hollow black up. The flowers on her hair and her garments were white and soft as cotton. The mirror in her hands was clear as crystal. The beauty of it was unbelievably sophisticated. Her grace was gorgeous, too. Her emotions were slightly the same as Shiori's, very excited and expecting, for _me_. The boy greeted first:

"I can't believe that we could live in the same roof one day, InuYasha ni-chan. Just in case you don't remember, my name is Kohaku. I'm looking forward to be your _otoutou_."

I was frozen in two fifth second. A ningen wanted to be my little brother? If I wasn't in full attention, I would have thought this could be an extremely wild dream. But instead of showing him my confusion, I gave him a wide grin to encourage the boy to say whatever he wanted. With that, his eyes sparked in joy. I lifted him up high in the air and he giggled like crazy.

"Sure, kid. It's very nice to meet you, Kohaku-kun."

"Kami blesses you, InuYasha ni-san. It's so gorgeous to talk to you." – said the hanyou girl. – "My name is Kanna. I hope that you can see me as your little sister."

She said it cheerfully, but however her voice had mild sadness. If my heart was still beating, it would have squeezed itself.

"I'm glad to have _another _sister, Kanna-chan. I'm not sure if I would be a good ni-chan for all of you."

"You already are!" – Three kids shouted together and jumped on me.

I was glad that I wasn't a mere hanyou anymore or the extra weight on my body would slam me down on the ground. My strength helped me to be on my feet. I shook the kids in my arms gently and they laughed like they never did before. A noise came from the ground. My keen eyes could see an iron trap door under a grass cover with confetti on it. I could detect a small but strong barrier shielding the trap door. The kids recognized that I had noticed the entry into their place and smiled. Kanna whispered:

"Only the one with both human and demon blooding flowing inside their veins could pass through it. With Kohaku, he would get in with a member of our group."

"Souka." – I nodded, understanding her explanation.

With my maximum speed, I darted to the trap door with the kids in my arms and jumped down the door just in a blink of eye. The slide way was like a long dark arch tunnel leading us deep down under the ground. When I felt my feet touched the surface, my senses started to inform me where I was. Kohaku said lowly:

"This way will lead us to the entryway. It's dark because only hanyous could see through this darkness; of course, the fog up there had the same effect. Before we all go in and introduce you to your new family, I'd like to remind you your relationship with me and Kanna-chan."

"I'd love to remember that. But who created the fog and this?" – I nodded, asking my question while we were all walking along the entrance.

"You'll know soon enough. There is a lot of things you need to learn, too." – Shiori winked her violet eye, holding my hand.

"So how do you remind me?" – I asked in interest.

"The mirror would help you." – said Kanna dreamingly.

I was confused at first, but then when my eyes hit the surface of Kanna's magic mirror, everything made sense. The mirror could show her anything, and I didn't need any explanation to figure it out. That was why they knew that I was coming up there, without sensing me. Kanna said hesitantly, I didn't miss that there was a hint of wariness in her voice:

"We'll start with your relationship with me first."

"Sure, I'm ready. Show me." – I said in encouragement. – "Whatever it is, I would accept it and try my best to understand and remember." – I added to ease their nervousness.

They were relieved a bit, but it was obviously tense. It was understandable because every hanyou's past was tragic. Kohaku and Shiori nodded and Kanna made a vision appeared in her mirror. I saw a very nasty hanyou in the mirror. He had countless tentacles on his body and his organs certainly had come from a lot of different demons. It seemed like he had ability to absorb other demons' powers and bodies. The corruption he created looked terrifying. Kohaku smiled warmly:

"You destroyed that horrible monster. You should be proud."

I did? I had destroyed a hanyou? I tried to understand the situation. Shiori seemed to notice my problem. She explained:

"He wasn't a normal hanyou. A human bandit, who was nearly dead, let the demons eat his body and from that, the hanyou named Naraku was born. He was created by the bandit and the demons that consume his body."

I was frozen and looked at the hanyou's image. His smirk was evil; whatever he was up to was definitely no good. The name Naraku did sound familiar to me. My brain cells were racing in my skull. I remembered the sounds of evil laughs, cold voice coming from a certain individual. Suddenly it hit me, hard.

_Flashback:_

"_I was facing my greatest enemy, Naraku the dark hanyou. His existence was already enough for me to detest him with everything I had. I knew that I had to defeat him, or I might lose something that I held dear. He smirked at me and said:_

'_InuYasha, you're too weak to even hope that you could beat me. Just accept the fact that you could never even touch me.'_

'_I maybe not strong, but my strength is enough to defeat a bastard like you, Naraku! I'll drag you to hell, if that's the last thing I ever do!' – My voice was strong and filled with anger, without fear or hesitation."_

**End flashback:**

I was frozen at the memory. What was I trying to protect from Naraku? I just couldn't remember. My eyes came back to the mirror. Naraku was creating something, a new form, a new body coming from his own body. Something stood up from his split organs. A little torso, with white glowing light and _a mirror _on its hand. I was dead stunned. The new reincarnation of my enemy was Kanna, the very child that was showing me my memory. I knew that there must be a reasonable explanation for this, so I just waited. Naraku's hand held a crystal ball and his smirk looked heartless. Kanna said bitterly:

"That's my heart."

Those words escaped from her lips smoothly, like it never mattered to her. Kanna explained:

"I was the void, the goddess of nothingness. Nothing was mattered to me. I couldn't feel anything. With me, everything was pointless and I just Naraku's tool."

I nodded. I understood the empty hole that stayed in her soul for all that time, the feeling that she didn't even know she was having; it was the _empty _feeling. Yes, it was a type of emotion too. People had it when they couldn't make out what they were living for, or why they existed. They had it when they had to do nothing else but obey orders from their cold-hearted creator. Her face was twisted in mild sadness when she explained. I knew it was difficult for her to express her feelings, because she was born to be nothing. But of course, she could always change that, because she had her own heart, her own desires and her own mind. I said soothingly:

"I understand, Kanna-chan. I know how you felt, I know exactly how things were to you and I'm sorry. You could always change your life, because your life and your destiny are yours, yours and yours only."

She smiled cheerfully. Her black eyes were lively, and at that moment, her name didn't fit her, not even a bit. Kanna continued her speech:

"Yes, I knew that when our last encounter in your previous life."

In her mirror, I saw myself, in my old red garments, blood on my body, standing in front of her. Her face, neck and body were shattered because of the battle. Pain crossed my mind. We fought, and she had to follow her master's order, to battle me even she maybe didn't want to. I heard myself said:

"Go Kanna. There's no point killing you now. You're free. You decide from now on. You have been damaged like that; I don't think Naraku would use you any longer."

I frowned at my words. They weren't so polite. Kanna just stood there, didn't show any signs of understanding my words at all. The real Kanna in front of me spoke:

"I didn't really understand your words. I was slightly surprised that you spare me even I'm your enemy. I admire your kindness, InuYasha ni-san."

"No need for ni-san, maybe just ni-chan or perhaps InuYasha. It doesn't sound right." – I told her automatically. It truly didn't feel right when I didn't do anything but I had enough standards to be an older brother.

"It sounds perfectly right! You have every right to become our brother!" – protested Shiori. I chuckled but shook my head lightly.

My mind was back to the mirror. I saw myself standing in front of Shiori and examining her emotions. Suddenly, she shattered into pieces of shiny glasses and I jumped back, didn't do_ anything _to prevent the tragic accident at all! I hissed angrily; that bastard hanyou crushed the crystal ball! Kanna smiled peacefully:

"Don't feel guilty, ni-chan. You killed that horrible creature, you ended the misery. All you need to feel is proud."

I gave her a grateful look. She appreciated that I had freed her, from her slavery life. I asked:

"Why are you still alive, Kanna-chan? Don't get me wrong, I'm really happy that you are."

"You were killed by Naraku, too; right after you defeated him, remember? How are you still able to live?" – Kanna answered a question by a question. – "But I wasn't saved by the same way that you were. Of course, your savior is also mine. She collected all the shattered pieces and based on my appearance, she created me a new body. We found out that I _did _have a soul after all that time. So I can have a real life that I never have now."

"Did you meet her?" – I asked quickly. I needed the answer immediately.

"So it's a she. No, I didn't. I was revived a short time before you come back to life. I met my new family the day before yesterday, so I don't know many people, not yet."

"I see. Well then, I'm not the only newcomer around here!" – I beamed playfully.

The kids chuckled because of my childish reaction. It wasn't really comfortable if you were completely new and the others were all strangers to you. Kohaku spoke, broke the chuckle:

"Remind you that I'm a newcomer, too. I guess it's time for your relationship with me."

Kanna's mirror went blank. After a few second, a new vision appeared. I saw him, preparing an attack towards me while I did nothing but block his attacks. I didn't fight back, and I thanked god for that. Then a flash, there was an image of him, bathed in blood. Kohaku took a deep breath to collect all his courage. I squeezed his shoulder for encouragement. He started:

"I came from a village of demon slayers. In a mission, I was killed by a demon and was possessed by it. I was just a dead corpse, made to kill my family and comrades."

He stopped, gathering more breaths. I felt his heart racing in his chest. I hoped to comfort him, to tell him that it was okay, but how could I? Killing the people we loved, by our own hands and weapons were unforgivable. Our mental would torture us to the moment that our hearts stopped beating. We waited, for him to get ready for the next part of his tragic life. He continued:

"Everyone in the village was dead, except my older sister. God blessed her. I was dead, until Naraku gave me a shard of the Shikon no Tama. I was back to life, bound to the shard. Just like Kanna, I was his tool, too. I didn't know who I was, or had any memories about my life. I was just simply a puppet. That was why I turned against you."

This time, I was really glad that my heart wasn't beating any longer, or it would drive me mad. This _ningen_ boy's past was much worse than a few hanyous' themselves. Without any explanation, I knew that he would really want to suicide right after he regained his memories. The feeling when we recognized that our friends and family were killed by our own hands would push anyone to the brink of insanity. I whispered soothingly, my voice was like a ringing bell:

"Kohaku-kun, I'm sorry that I couldn't do anything. I know the horrible emotion you had when the memories were back in your mind."

"Don't feel bad about that, ni-chan. That dark time is over now." – sighed Kohaku, glancing at the mirror. – "Besides, you did help me!"

The mirror flashed and another vision came. I saw Kohaku, lying on the ground while an older girl was pointing her sword at his neck. They shared the same features and were both demon slayers. With both luck and bad luck, my head felt like a hammer just hit it again.

_Flashback:_

_The saltiness of tears reached my nose. I forced my legs to run as fast as possible. My ears twitched insanely. Every part of my body was working as hard as possible. I heard a girl's voice:_

"_Kohaku, I'll kill you and then I'll kill myself. It's the only way to set you free."_

_Hearing that, I darted to the place with my maximum speed. I prayed that my body could hold fast until I completed my current task, to stop someone from doing something foolish. Before I knew it, my hand stopped the girl from stabbing Kohaku with her sword. Her face was wet because of her own tears. I hissed angrily:_

"_Don't kill Kohaku! We still have hope. I will bring him back for you. Just don't kill him. That's what Naraku wants you to do!"_

**End flashback**

It was a major headache. I held my head with one hand and rubbed my smooth platinum hair gently. This memory was crazier than last one. I stuttered:

"I think… I remember. But… who is that girl? I guess that's your sister, Kohaku but… do I know her?"

The voice of Kohaku's sister was strangely _familiar _to me. Deep inside, I felt like… I'd heard her voice quite often in the past. But whatever it was, I wanted to forget it so during my transformation, I didn't think about it. I regained my calm form and looked at their faces. The kids were quite confused and nervous with my question. Their fingers rubbed their _kosode_ anxiously. I waved my hand lightly and said:

"You don't need to tell me. It's not important anyway. I guess we can just keep going."

They looked at each other in surprise and smiled at me. Shiori said:

"You're right. Besides, Kohaku's sister dislikes demons and hanyous. You don't need to know about her. I guess if we see her, we can just ignore her."

"Yeah, that's right. I don't enjoy seeing my sister either." – Kohaku nodded her head.

"She hates you, doesn't she?" – I asked sadly.

"Well, no actually. But she detests my weak heart. I was a dirty stain of my family, being possessed by a demon after I was dead was truly disgrace." – said Kohaku, frowning.

"She's so absurd. How could she blame you? You got yourself killed, so you didn't have control over your body anymore!" – I said, raising my eyebrow. I was angry at his words beyond I could imagine. My new self reacted seriously in front of things. My emotions were so hard to be controlled. Right now, I recognized my new strength was powerful enough to control my body itself, so I had to be careful.

"I don't know that either. Sometimes, it hurts knowing that she scorches my existence." – Kohaku shook his head lightly. – "But that's okay now, because I have a bunch of brothers and sisters, don't I?" – He added playfully.

I nodded hard. My mind was still wondering about Kohaku's ningen sister. Somehow, Kohaku's situation reminded me my own problem in the past. We were being hated by something that we don't have control over. But I really didn't remember what exactly my problem was and how. It didn't matter, right? Because I had a new future ahead and the past didn't matter anymore.

Before I knew, a big elegant gate made by fragrant wood hit my eyes. There were pretty lianas of soft confetti wrapping around the wooden-bars of the gate. A few meters behind the gate, every member of the group was standing there calmly and welcoming to greet their "siblings" home and also welcome me to _my new home_. They all wore dark color garments and I was glad that I chose black for my outfit. Their innocent gentle eyes were looking at each other and also the gate at the same time. I could feel hint of mild sadness and anger coming from them, but the feeling of being together and having more friends had overcome the other negative feelings. My clear visions showed me every single detail of their appearances. The hanyous were blessed a unique beauty by their demon blood combined with the innocent compassion blood of their human blood. Their hatred and deadly feud for demons and humans were easily detected. Shiori spoke happily

"I think you'd like to open the gate of you new home in the first time you see it."

I beamed politely at her, nodding my head. The sensation came naturally, I didn't have to think or beware of anything. The risk that my strength might make didn't bother me either. The feeling was so nice and dreamlike. It felt like my nastiest wish had come true or should I say… it really _did _come true. I reached for the rough but soft wooden gate, gently pushed it in. Slowly, I walked inside, scanning all the faces that were staring at me with hopes clearly in their eyes. A smile formed on my lips. Even the place was underground; sunlight could still reach to it. The yard that all of us was standing in looked perfectly wonderful. The plants and flowers were planted nicely and deftly. Most of the hanyous were younger than me, some of them was probably at the same age and very least of them was older than me. I wondered should I greet first or they would first. I decided that would be me and prepared my mind in one tenth second. In attempt to start my speech, I heard a hanyou girl said first:

"Thank you Kohaku-kun and Kanna-chan for showing our new family member his new home. And Shiori-chan, you should be more careful. It's not so nice bothering your new brother before he could even greet you."

"Don't worried, it's my job to help her. I very appreciate your nice and welcoming invitation to your huge family. It's obvious that I really don't deserve your warm welcome, but since you all offered me help, I accept it with all my heart. It's my greatest pleasure to stand here, look at my new home and get to know my new family."

The speech came out smoothly and naturally. I didn't need much time or prepare for it at all. It just came out, along with my train of thoughts, coherently and perfectly. They all stared at me for a single second and then gave me huge grins and smiles. In a blink, with their speed, the little hanyous had surrounded me and hugged every part of me that they could reach. A strange feeling consumed me. I wasn't completely happy because some sort of weird sadness still haunted me. Why could I be sad when someone expressed their hearty feelings toward me? I restrained myself from doing anything stupid and beamed lightly along with the crowd. They started dragging me inside the big residence. The first chamber was enormous, obviously for special guests, important meetings and discussion. All of us could fit in the chamber and there was still huge space for tables and chairs, but I had a feeling that they preferred to sit on the ground. The wall at the end of the chamber was filled with maps, drawings, news and stuff. The main chamber was connected to two other chambers. They weren't as big as the first one, but certainly they weren't so small either. They gave me a tour to look around while talking politely to me. I didn't miss any details of the residence and also a word that they said:

"The biggest chamber is the Great Hall or the Grand Hall, whatever you like it to be." – A hanyou boy with blonde hair and grey eyes chirped and I nodded at him while giving him a beam.

"We eat dinner here, maybe outside the field. Sometimes we go hunting in the forest for raw meat." – said a hanyou at about my age with long green hair and orange eyes, I told her: "That's great!"

"Deadly serious meetings and discussions are in the Great Hall, ni-chan." – A very young girl with violet hair and black eyes told me while tugging my _haori _for my attention. I rubbed her hair gently. Her use of words was very hanyou-like.

For the two chambers that were connected with the Great Hall, they said:

"The one on the left is infirmary. You should meet the healer. She's a god!" – A male hanyou at about my age informed me with a friendly smile. I shook his head and smiled. A sudden thought that the healer might be my savior.

"Whenever you feel a little dumb, go the chamber on the right. It's the library with more than a billion books rating from super rubbish to extremely awesome!"

I just expressed my grateful emotions toward all of them. We reached to the field behind the Great Hall, the infirmary and the library. The grass-carpet there was super smooth and very green. It was soft exactly like a silk carpet, with me perhaps. There were about twenty trees scattered in the field. Each of them was unbelievably tall and giant. Maybe about ten little young hanyous could sleep in each tree.

"We love the field! It's like the main area of this place. We do almost every activities here, even sleep!"

"Yes, we even train to fight and have fake battles here! It's great fun!"

"We also organize games and proms here to celebrate special events. You'll enjoy every minute!"

"The night sky looks stunning from this field! It's like a fantasy world!"

The next one was the armory. There were all kinds of weapons there. The metal chains, blades and swords shun when the light reached them. The sharpness of them was undoubtable.

"This little hut is extremely important, ni-chan. You should choose your weapon soon!"

"You can add new weapons here whenever you have one!"

The last thing was four dormitories. It was obvious that two for boys and two for girls. The dormitories were freaking enormous and divided into four floors each. But one of my statements was wrong.

"The first dormitory is for girls and the second one is for boys. The young ones sleep there mostly."

"Two top floors of the third one are for girls and the two on the ground are for boys!"

"Yeah, but you can always sleep in the field if you want!"

Then silence suddenly ruled the air. My senses immediately searched for something unusual, but I caught nothing. I asked loudly:

"What about the fourth dormitory may I ask?"

A lot of snickers escaped from their lips. I tried to think which part of my question was funny. A girl spoke:

"The fourth one is for couples. You know, dating couples!" – More snickers. I found myself want to blush, but my blood couldn't reach my cheeks anymore, thank god for that.

"But none of us dares to think about… mating because it sucks! Making more souls suffer this horrible life is unacceptable!"

"Well, none of you has reached the age to mate anyway." – I pointed out the obvious truth.

"Yeah, and mostly we're brothers, sisters, friends, companions, comrades, whatever you want to use." – Shiori said while giggling.

"Well, let's push this crazy subject into a corner so we could introduce ourselves." – I told them. – "I want a challenge with my memory to see if I can remember all your names and information."

They laughed out loud and said:

"Bring it on, ni-chan!"

"Bring in on, dude!"

Together, we headed to the Great Hall.

A/N: What do you think? I tried to make this chapter long and I think I got my goal. Leave me comments okay? Thanks for reading.


	10. Unanswered Questions

Disclaim: InuYasha doesn't belong to me, but the content of this story does.

_To Skyflower, the cousin who has turned my hellish life into paradise._

Thank you all readers who spend time for my story and leave me your comments.

**Chapter 10: **Unanswered questions

**Sesshomaru's Point of View:**

Leaving Totosai's place, I was quite pissed off. I couldn't follow the taijiya because he was likely disappeared in thin air leaving no trace at all. How weird things could get? I hoped no more, because for the first time, I felt extremely clueless and dumb! I headed back to where I left Rin and Jaken. As usual, Rin was picking flowers while Jaken was resting on Ah-Un, complaining about the little ningen. As soon as he saw me, the imp stopped talking and bowed at me to greet. Rin cheered happily:

"You're back, Sesshomaru-sama!"

"Was everything okay here?"- I asked her, but the one who should answer was obviously Jaken.

"Rin and Ah-Un were very good, but Jaken-sama is upset!" – She chirped while pointing at the sweating imp. I smirked inside my mind.

My little companions followed me again. I set the destination in my head. There was nothing that the ancient tree didn't know. He was more than 2000 years old! But somehow, the possibility that I would get the answers was small. I didn't believe that InuYasha was dead, but I can't proof that he was alive either. A footprint wasn't convincing enough, and there was no way I would dig his tomb. Disturbing a dead body could be really annoying. The way to the Bokuseno's place wouldn't take too long if I went by myself, but I guessed Rin and Jaken were bored to be left alone all day. Besides, Rin had met the tree before and she might want to say "hi". The bad one was Jaken; he was rude when he faced a tree that supposed to be his great great grandfather. After about an hour, we reached the forest. Bokuseno greeted me before I could even notice his presence.

"Good day to you, Sesshomaru."

He was too old so he never called me "sama". It would sound weird for an old person like that to call a youngster "sama". In a while, I was surprised at myself to think about something like that. I glanced at Bokuseno when his face appeared from the tree trunk. Rin was stunned for a second, but then her memory came back to her about the first time she saw Bokuseno. The little girl looked like she was about to point at the tree but then she remembered that it was rude to point so she said politely:

"Good morning, Bokuseno-sama."

The tree gave Rin an awkward warm smile. I mean who wouldn't like Rin? The ancient tree turned to me:

"There must be a reason for this visit, huh Sesshomaru?"

"Don't address Sesshomaru-sama in such a disrespect manner, old tree!" – Jaken snorted.

"Shut up, Jaken." – I growled at the imp.

"It seems like your greatest enemy is destroyed but you're still not satisfied." – beamed Bokuseno. – "I'm ready for your question."

"How do you know my enemy is dead?"- I raised my eyebrow. I was sure that it happened just a few days ago and this information was certainly not in a book.

"News travels fast, Sesshomaru." – Bokuseno chuckled making me feel even dumber.

"I'm not here to talk about rubbish things, Bokuseno. I'm here to ask about my filthy half-brother." – I spitted everything out so that the tree wouldn't make any more comments. The tree was surly old, and I gave him the right to address me by my name, but that didn't mean I would act like his grandson.

"Again with hanyou InuYasha? You said he's nothing to you but it seems like every time you're here, the questions you ask involve him." – Another unnecessary comment came out.

"InuYasha is dead after he killed our enemy. But then weird things happened." – I informed him. – "Just before his heart stopped beating, it beat like racing in his chest. After that, Tessaiga glowed and became a part of him, but he can't still make it to survive."

"So what's your specific question, Sesshomaru? Why didn't he survive or why was Tessaiga incorporated into him?"

"It's obvious that I want answers for both questions." – I replied immediately.

"Why were you so sure that his heart stops beating meant he really is dead?" – Bokuseno asked, his eyes examining me. – "What did InuYasha look like when his heart stopped beating?"

That I didn't know for sure. At first, he looked like a real mess, worse than our father when he rushed to save InuYasha and his ningen mother. After the humans cleaned his skin, he did look better, a bit. But I didn't detect anything unusual. I spent most time in that village sitting outside the hut and waited the burial to be done. I shook my head and said:

"He still looked like the dirty hanyou that he was always be until his friends finished burying him."

"And then after that?" – Another question was shot. Was I the one who asked questions here or him?

"What are you leading me to, Bokuseno?" – I raised my eyebrow.

"Sesshomaru, don't jump to conclusion when things are still unclear. You came here, because you don't believe that InuYasha is dead. Then relieve yourself, Lord of the Western Land. There are two options, check his tomb or live with your curiosity for the rest of your life. But I'll give you a hint. The InuYasha you know is dead." – The tree advised and then he disappeared into his trunk again.

I stood there, frozen. I wasn't sure if he liked to check the hanyou's tomb and I surly didn't want to dig all the dirt up just to see his body in a casket. But what if his body wasn't there? Like Bokuseno said, I needed to see that by my own eyes to relieve myself. This Sesshomaru wasn't going to live with his curiosity. And his hint, why did it sound so weird? _The InuYasha I knew was dead_. Wasn't it the conclusion that the hanyou really was dead? Then why did I need to check his tomb? These questions were drying me crazy. I looked at my companions. They looked at me with wide eyes. I told them:

"Let's go."

**With InuYasha's human pack:**

After InuYasha's burial, they were still very confused. InuYasha was dead. It was hard to believe. He was always the strongest one in their group, the first one to recover and heal, the one who complained while the others slowed down. And now, he would never do that again. Kagome was quite upset; she was frustrated that InuYasha didn't even confess his feelings with her. She cried, but then she was angry. The young miko broke a few things then jumped into the well to go home to rest. Shippo was the same. He cried like a baby but then he sat next to the tomb and slammed his weak hand on the dirt:

"Baka Inuyasha! Even when you're dead, you still upset Kagome!"

Miroku sat in the hut with Sango, eyeing the tomb next to the sacred tree. They were still shocked. It happened so quickly and ended so quickly. Miroku couldn't believe that Kazaana had left his hand. He was relieved but sad. His friend sacrificed himself for him and he didn't do anything to say thanks. Sango just sat there and froze like a statue. Sometimes, she shook her head and mumbled "no". The taijiya didn't hear anything about Kohaku since Naraku was destroyed and she was anxious. The Shikon no Tama was whole, which meant the shard in Kohaku's neck was gone, too. The chance that he survived was very little, and she didn't want to think about it. It was impossible. While sitting soullessly like that, they were interrupted by the old miko. Kaede stepped inside the hut and told the monk and taijiya:

"The village nearby was attacked by weird creatures wearing black. What do you think?"

A/N: What do you think folks? Reviews, please!


	11. New life

Disclaim: InuYasha doesn't belong to me, but the content of this story does.

_To Warren, my favorite English teacher, who had increased my vocabulary._

A/N: New academic year is arriving soon and I don't think I'll update so often. I'm going to try to update almost constantly in the last weeks of my summer holiday. Enjoy folks!

**Chapter 11: **New life

**InuYasha's Point of View:**

It was hard to believe that I was a newcomer. Everyone, I mean my new brothers and sisters treated me like they'd known me since we were born. The connection between us was more than blood and flesh. Yet things were still new to me. I didn't know everything about myself. My mind knew that I didn't know how to use my new body wisely.

Since I came here, I'd remembered all the rooms and areas of our residence and also everyone's names. My brain was limitless. I could throw as many things as I wanted into my brain and it would remember all, every detail. The bad thing was because of my perfect memory, I remembered every second of my transformation. The pain and the flame were still horrifying to me. No-one knew anything about me. If they did, they would have told me. And the thing that bothered me most was that I didn't find my savior yet. I knew she was here, living in this very residence along with other hanyous, but she never showed up. Disappointment blasted me when everyone introduced themselves but the hanyou-girl who saved me wasn't there.

_Flashback:_

"_Everyone, find your seats on the ground and each of you will introduce your name, okay?" – A hanyou girl spoke loudly so everyone could hear. She seemed to be the oldest. She was even older than I was, her appearance, at least. _

"_Are you all ready?" – said a boy excitedly. _

"_YES!" – shouted everyone, including me. I was standing in front of all the sitting hanyous in the Great Hall._

"_You can sit down, you know. When their turn comes, they would stand up to introduce so you can see their faces." – winked the oldest girl._

_Soon, silence ruled the chamber but to me, the sounds of wind, animals and plants were still clear. The oldest girl went first:_

"_Welcome to our family, InuYasha-san. I'm Kimude. I'm not the leader, if you think I am. There's no leader here. I just happen to be the oldest here."_

_Oh, so that made sense. And her name, Kimude meant 'smoke'. Her eyes were red, but not the same red like my eyes. My eyes were bloody red while her eyes were brighter than that and obviously, they were less terrifying. I shook her hand and replied politely to my new older sister:_

"_It's my pleasure to meet you, Kimude-san. I assume your name has something involving your power?"_

"_You're very smart. My power causes smoke. I create fire and control fire, but not as powerful as my mother." – replied Kimude while she gave me a funny pout._

_Then she turned to the young ones:_

"_It's your turn!"_

"_Hi, my name's Kumano. I can stop the rain, and well, that's all. My old man can change the weather." – He introduced while waving his hand at me and giving me a warm smile._

_I nodded my head and said: "Hello Kumano-san." He seemed to be as old as me. 'Kumano' means cloud and the name fit him very well. His blond hair looked like sunlight and his grey eyes were the first sign of a mild storm._

"_Welcome home, InuYasha ni-chan! I'm Sishi. Well, I guess you know what kind of hanyou I am already." – The little girl chirped nicely at me. She was a neko hanyou with orange eyes, cute black cat-ears and brown hair. Her name means 'cub'._

_And so it went on until the last person. But the girl I expected didn't show up."_

**End flashback:**

I remembered every detail of the first day I saw my new home and family. It had been a week since I moved in. There were total seventy hanyous in our place, including me. Kumano told me that there were only seventy left in this world and since I joined them, there wasn't anyone else like us out there. Most hanyous were killed when they were young or even were born. The lucky ones survived and still escaped from their ugly fate. And the lucky ones here were us.

Our schedule for the day was simple. In the morning, we woke up at dawn to catch the rising sun because most of us thought that it would bring luck. Well, I didn't think so because I wasn't really superstitious but I did believe in some myths. Still, I woke up with almost all of them to sit in the wide field and enjoy the cool fresh air of a new day. I covered most part of my body so they didn't notice that my skin glowed in sunlight. After about an hour later, breakfast was served. The first breakfast here I had some fruit from _Kosua_, a tree hanyou. Her name means exactly what she produced: fruit but oddly, she couldn't create flowers! I guess her youkai creator could. The second morning, we went hunting near the residence. It was really fun, chasing the animals around. Eating raw meat for a change was really satisfying. It was until I discovered that I found satisfactory in watching their souls leaving their bodies. I had a hollow feeling when their souls left this world. A strange sensation passed me as I knew for sure that it was dead. I disgusted myself but then I blocked that feeling so I could join Shiori and Kohaku back to our place. We even tried human food and it went well enough.

After breakfast, we started combat training. It was the funniest part of the day. Watching the youngsters knocking each other out was real entertainment. But that didn't mean I underestimated them. They were real fighters. Their moves were pretty accurate. The way they used their weapons was very effective. _While fighting, the weapon is a part of your body. _It was what Kohaku told me while he struck his giant sickle and iron chains toward me. His face expressed nothing. I just simple chose a sword, but I didn't really use it. I mean, my arms and legs weren't for show! But using weapons wisely wasn't a bad lesson so I tried my best to fight with the sword. I was the best in the part "Fighting with no weapons". I mean, my strength, my speed, my senses and my instincts allowed me to know their moves before they even struck, to block every of their attack and to make surprise attacks easily. And I didn't even waste a bit of my energy!

Using weapons wasn't so bad. I learned everything really quickly. I could almost use anything and everything, but using them well was another problem. The difference between _knowing to use _and _using well_ was quite big. I was a fine swordsman. Kohaku showed me how to use the sickles and the chains so I did well. I didn't try the shields because my skin was even harder than the shields. There were a bunch of weapons to choose and I didn't decide yet but there was plenty of time before my first battle with our enemies. Yuki, Kimude's cousin told me that our enemies were the hanyou-killers. Well, I would definitely make sure that none of them would live in the day that I met them. I couldn't stand the thoughts that one of the hanyous in this big family would get killed because of those full-blooded jerks.

Hours in the library were interesting. I'd known by heart totally ninety-seven books and I had a feeling that I'd like to know more! I enjoyed reading about history, geography, wars, weapons and however myths, too. The weird thing was I found a strange book written by a funny language. Curiosity got better than me, so I opened that book. The letters suddenly floated on the grey pages of the book and unscrambled themselves into the language I knew. The book wrote about myths of Meidou (hell), death, the guardians of death, stuff like that. It was a gloomy book, but very intriguing to me. I was completely sucked into it so I took it out of the library after asking _Echi _for permission. The little boy informed me that no-one had ever been able to read this funny book. _Echi_ means "wisdom", but the boy read too many books so he was a little dumb sometimes. Echi said that I could have it forever if I wanted, because no-one would care if the book was missing.

Dinner was a spectacular experience. Sitting together in the charming field under the night sky filling with stars was something I could never dream of in my previous life. The laughter, the giggles, talking voices, care and love that we gave each other were beyond everything. The food was delicious, most of them were grilled but the heat and hotness of them would charge us the energy that we unleashed after a day long. Besides, we weren't completely grown-ups yet and we didn't even have an adult around here to give us a lecture about healthy food! The grass, the trees, the flowers, the sky with stars on it seemed to watch out for all of us, too. After dinner, we sat around the fire that we grilled food with to tell jokes and reviewed everything we did in the day. Yuki informed me that there would be a meeting every ten days. Well, I looked forward to have my first meeting, only three days more!

Right now, it was midnight. The stars were sparkling in the sky. I could feel that they were having their own conversation with each other. The way they communicated was something not that anyone could understand. But there was certainly a big secret hiding in those dancing sparkle lights. The moon was hanging dreamingly at the middle of the dark indigo sky. With my new eyes, I recognized that the sky wasn't really black at night. The moon was mysterious, gentle, pure and charming in a soothing way. It seemed to try to hide its beauty behind that pale color, but for someone who looked at it carefully and discovered it meticulously. It was distrustful but once we earned its trust, it would be beyond marvelous. Somehow, I felt like the moon was exactly the same as someone I knew…

Peaceful silence hugged our residence. Mostly everyone was asleep. I guessed the old ones were still awaking and chatting. But no, my keen ears told me that no-one was talking. I was lying on the floor of the second floor of the third dormitory. Most hanyous who were sleeping with me on this floor were at the same age as me, maybe a few decades younger. The youngsters slept in the first two dormitories. Most of them preferred to sleep on the ground-floor so if anything happened, they could get out quickly dealing with whatever that happened. With my ability, I was sure that I could get out faster than anyone so even I slept on the top floor, there wouldn't be any problem. I closed my eyes so that the others wouldn't be terrified if they saw two bloody red orbs floating in the dark. I didn't need to sleep so much in this life I recognized. Maybe I needed to sleep only once a week. It was strange that when I slept, I felt like I was connected to a link that leaded me to another world. The visions were blurred so I couldn't make out what that world looked like. But whatever it was, it reminded me the feeling I had when I saw souls of the animals I killed leaving their bodies. It was absolutely a sickened feeling. I felt like a beast. Even they trusted me with everything, but I reminded myself not to get too close to them or bad things would happen. That was what my instinct told me, and I would not ignore that advice.

The sounds of the leaves in the trees touching each other were very clear. Hours more until dawn and another day would start. I listened to the sounds and smelled the scents. I remembered the scents of every member in my pack. It was too easy. And suddenly, it hit me, hard. I recognized the scent immediately when it appeared. That scent, I would never forget. It was how my savior smelled like. Her scent was like all flowers combined, but mostly was jasmines, roses, lavender and perhaps some herbs. In a blink, I darted to the window. My red eyes scanned the field in front of the dormitory quickly and carefully. I wanted to make sure that my nose didn't trick me. But a shadow at the middle of the field entered my sight. She was _right there_, sitting on a swing that was tied to a branch of the biggest oak tree. The flowery chains of the swing were tied to a strong branch of the tree. The seat was a plank knitted by some kind of creeper. She was swinging slowly; her black garments flew in the wind. I held my breath and stared at her. My savior really was there…

I knew that it was my chance to meet her. She chose this time to show up, which meant that she was ready to meet me. I didn't hear her moving in the field, so I guessed she somehow had teleported into the field. Carefully, I opened the window and then jumped out. My body darted through the air and gracefully landed on the grass in just one hundredth second. I was glad that I didn't make any noise. I walked across the field in my average speed, but it was equal to the others' running speed. She didn't move, so it was clear that she didn't want to avoid me now. If she wanted to, she would have disappeared before I could even blink. When our distance was narrow, I approached her slowly. Something told me not to rush or it would be rude. I was calm enough to restrain myself from freaking out, but not enough to stop butterflies to fly in my stomach. This feeling, it was so new. It felt like the feeling was dead long ago, but now it was awakened, full of energy and vitality. I thanked god that my heart wasn't beating anymore or it would dance madly in my chest. My blood was still inside veins so it was impossible for me to blush. I felt like I was born to become what I was right now. Things fit, very well.

I was right behind her back. She had stopped swinging few minutes ago. I could see that she was almost as tall as me, and her torso was very gracefully slender. From how thick her garments were, I could see that she didn't want anyone to notice how her body exactly looked like. I felt like I was the one who had to start the conversation. I cleared my throat; even there was nothing that blocked my throat.

"So you finally came." – It wasn't a nice way to greet someone, my mind told me.

Then a silence got in. I stood there still like a statue. I was patient, more than I was in my previous life. It didn't bother me that she didn't reply me immediately. Looking at her was good enough. Finally, she turned to me:

"Would you like to sit down, InuYasha?"

The way she addressed me made me feel pleased. I didn't like the words "san", "sama", "ni-chan", "kun" or anything similar to that. But then, there was a snatch. I felt something pull me down to the ground. A purple light came out from the beads around my neck. It was pure. The beads snatched me the ground, making my face meet the ground. I quickly composed myself and stood up. Embarrassment filled me. Even blood wasn't running in my veins anymore, I could still feel smoke flying from my ears. Why did I act so stupid in front of her? I expected her to chuckle, to make a fun comment about it and I would have to cover my face with my hands but it never came. I watched as another swing was formed from the creeper and flowers and tied next to her swing. Feeling like an idiot, I came and stood on the swing next to her. Her blue eyes met mine, blocked mine with her. Her eye color was completely opposite with mine. From that moment, I knew that I was an opposite image of her. She was flawless while I had a bunch of flaws. She was talented while I was useless. Her voice cut my train of thoughts off:

"Your eye color would change after you decide what you want to do with your new life."

I tried to understand her words, but it was very unclear. I tilted my head to shoot my mute question, but something told me that I would have to answer that question by myself. I said:  
"Could you tell me why my face hit the ground a while ago?"

She eyed the purple beads around my neck with concern. The girl touched those beads with her fingers carefully like she tried not to break it. She asked me:

"Do you remember who gave you this?"

"No, if I do I would have returned this _generous gift_." – I replied sarcastically.

She seemed to chuckle, but no noise came out. She asked me:

"You want it out?"

"Please." – I pleaded her simply; my eyes looked straight into hers.

Suddenly, she snatched the beads out of my neck so quickly that even I didn't blink; I still couldn't predict what she was going to do. When that happened, the purification light flared up and then went away just as fast as it appeared. If my skin wasn't hard like stone, I would cry out lowly. The girl commented:

"Whoever placed it on you, they wanted to restrain you."

Then she crushed the beads into dust with her small hand. Relieve filled my mind. It was like I just threw away a big burden to me. She continued:

"It would prevent you from being yourself. You should decide where to put your loyalty to because anyone who has relationship with you would not have a smooth life."

I raised my eyebrow, not fully understand what she meant. I said:

"Thank you, for everything."

"What is that everything, exactly?" – She asked after a few quiet minutes.

"For saving my sorry life, for giving me my second chance, for respecting me and most of all, for giving me a choice." – I replied immediately. No-one in this residence had given me my own choice, even they were nice. With everyone, their own decision would matter most. It decided who they really were.

"All of them are nothing comparing to the agony I gave you during that transformation." – She said coldly, but the coldness of her voice was from herself. However, it hurt me even it meant to lecture her.

"That was my choice. You only tried to help." – I reassured her, squeezing her shoulder with my hand. She placed her hand on mind and squeezed back. Her hand had the same temperature like mine. It felt nice. Calm felt every corner of my soul.

"You would hate me if you know what I have turned you into." – She sighed, eyeing me carefully like she tried to measure if I was strong enough to handle the facts.

"I made the decision. The one to blame is me only." – I protested calmly.

"You will, InuYasha. I couldn't even imagine how angry you will be at me, but it won't reach the level that I supposed to suffer." – She told me gently and that made me feel bad. Then a rough small laugh that I could tell it was better to cry than to fake a horrible laugh like that. Why would she blame herself like that?

"I don't hate anyone more than I hate myself. Trust me with this one." – I informed her.

We both kept quiet after this. I re-considered my words and thought if I said anything wrong, but no, I didn't regret any of them. The girl sighed heavily; her breath was exactly like herbs. I glanced at her, tried to detect more features than just her eyes and skin. I saw a curl of her hair. It was bronze brown, a perfect warm color. I felt the silkiness of that hair without touching it. She was damn miraculous while I was just an idiot. She spoke again:

"Do you believe in myths?"

I started to swing a little to ease my emotion down. I replied:

"I do believe in some of them, not everything."

"You don't trust anything completely, do you?" – She asked with her even voice.

"Well, I don't even trust myself." – I defined myself.

"Then will you believe me if I say you not really are a living creature?" – She questioned me.

"With the tone you're talking with, I do. I feel distant with the living world since the transformation was over." – I admitted the fact.

"That was just the first stage." – She nodded her head lightly. – "Do you feel satisfied when you kill something?" – Shooting the question, she looked right into my red eyes. I felt like she was examining every corner of my soul.

"I only killed a few animals in this life and yes, I have that disgusting feeling." – I tried to move my eyes from her but couldn't.

"Did you finish reading that Latin book you're having?" – Another question and I raised my eyebrow. I was sure that even I couldn't see her but that didn't mean she wasn't around.

"Almost, but I read fast. I don't read every detail so far." –I informed her.

"So what's the book about, do you know?" – I could taste the sourness in her voice.

"It's about a myth of the worlds that exist: heaven, earth and hell. But mostly, it's about hell, the third one." – I answered smoothly without thinking. I felt like my brain had prepared for this.

"Then I think you're smart enough to figure it out what you are by yourself." – I detected a hint of amusement in her tone right now.

"I'm just a part of what you are, right?" – I asked this question that bothered for the past few days.

She didn't reply, and I assumed that was a "yes". I bit my lips thoughtfully, trying to make out she wanted to lead me to.

"I could even sense it when something is dead." – I informed the terrifying news.

But she said nothing, like it was a normal thing. I was a bit disappointed of myself for not being sharper. My nose could smell sunlight. It was nearly dawn. A new day would arrive soon and I was sure that she didn't the others to see us sitting on swings next to each other. She said, and from her tone, I knew it was farewell:

"InuYasha, I think you should read that book really carefully. Don't miss any detail and you will know. And I'm in this family too so there's plenty of time for us to meet but I think it's the best for us not to do that in public."

I knew she was serious with the last sentence. When we sat together, I could feel a spine-chilling aura that we both created. Not that I was uncomfortable, I felt really nice, but I knew what the others would feel. She stood up and prepared to leave. I asked quickly:

"Wait, you didn't even tell me your name!"

"I don't think my name matters, InuYasha." – She gave me a quick glance.

"So we're friends?" – I asked hopefully.

"If that's what you wish." – She replied then took her full speed to jump on the top floor of the third dormitory. I felt a weird feeling when I knew that she would sleep in the same dormitory.

I didn't like her answer to my last question. I did wish that we were friends, but I wondered if she wanted the same. It was very hard for her to like a low one like me, but she did save my life. Looking at the now pink horizon, I darted back to the second floor of my dormitory. The hollow feeling and unexplainable loneliness inside me was gone…

A/N: What do you think? Leave me reviews.


	12. Issues

Disclaim: InuYasha doesn't belong to me, but the content of this story does.

_To Dunn, my generous uncle._

Thank you for your reviews.

* * *

**Chapter 12: **Issues

**InuYasha's Point of View:**

Dawn broke. I darted to the field before anyone could, where the faints scent of the nameless hanyou and me were still floating dimly in the air. A real smile formed on my lips. It was my eighth day in the residence, and everything seemed to be perfect. The young hanyous were still sleepy when they carried themselves to the field. From the look of their faces, I could tell that their eyelids were so heavy that they would shut at anytime. Kohaku didn't have problems at getting up early like the others did. I assumed that humans had routine to get up so early and ended up getting used to it. The young taijiya squeezed my shoulder amicably when he sat next to me on the grass. I beamed at him and asked:

"Hey kid, have a good sleep?"

"Sure, ni-chan. Are you having a good time here?" – He questioned me with concern.

"I can't even find a suitable word to describe my life in this place. It's like my wildest dream has come true somehow." – I chuckled at the boy's wary face.

"Well then, it's not a dream anymore, is it?" – Kohaku winked his eyes and I nodded.

The sun was carrying itself up into the air along with us. I had a feeling that the sun wasn't very happy getting up early either. The naughty birds that always sang happy songs and explored trees were now asleep peacefully even another day had begun. My mind paid attention to another hanyou who came to join Kohaku and me. Even she was still quite far away, I could tell that she was Yuki. She cheerfully skipped toward us while holding some fruit. When she reached the distant that could be able to hear my voice, I spoke:

"Feeling excited about something, eh Yuki-chan?"

"We should be all excited whenever new day comes, shouldn't we? But there's a reasonable explanation to my excitement." – chirped Yuki. She had snow white skin and pale blue hair. Her hair looked like countless snowflakes combined, very special. Well, it suited her name. Yuki means snow.

"Our ears are on." – Kohaku replied when he recognized Yuki.

"You should really go to the Great Hall more often you know. Sometimes we hang announcements, notices and bulletins so it's necessary to know." – advised the girl.

"Well, that's not in the schedule!" – protested Kohaku with an innocent pout.

Yuki just laughed and hit his shoulder lightly. I thought for a moment and guessed:

"Let me guess, it's somebody's special day?"

"Well, what can I say? You truly are our ni-chan, know stuff." – She grinned.

"More specific, please?" – asked Kohaku curiously.

"It's Shiori's birthday, dummy!" – She knocked gently on Kohaku's hair and the boy rubbed his hair.

"Are you planning something? I can see the word 'surprise' on your face." – I raised my eyebrow.

"Well yeah! It's her special day so it's our job to make it special, right?" – asked Yuki. – "We informed everyone last week but of course, Shiori didn't know nor it'll ruin everything."

"Right, how do you keep secret while preparing stuff, _Suyuki_-chan?" – mocked Kohaku goofily.

_Suyuki_ means Snow White. Other hanyous used that name to tease Yuki. She said:

"I just asked the others. We'll divide into two teams. Team 1 would stay here to prepare things while team 2 would take Shiori to go somewhere during the preparation."

"That sounds like a plan to me. So what do you want us to do? Prepare or distract?" – I asked her with interest. It sounded intriguing.

"Your choice, boys! We've got 69 people, so 35 ones would prepare and the rest would distract. Where do you want to go?"

Wow, so we could choose. I wondered if my savior suggested them to let people take their own picks. I turned to Kohaku:

"What would you like to do?"

He was thoughtful, too. Then he asked Yuki an unexpected question:

"What does Kanna-chan do?"

Yuki and I was quite stunned and then burst into a low laugh, making the boy blush. I winked his eyes:

"Oh, so you're Kanna's tail huh?"

"No, I just want to support her!" – He shook his head and waved his hands in panic.

"You're going to sleep in the forth dormitory soon, Haku-kun!" – giggled Yuki in amuse.

"Hey, that's not nice!" – argued Kohaku, but his cheeks betrayed him by turning into tomato-red.

"Anyway, Kanna stays for the preparation so that means you'll stay?" – There was still hint of laughter in her voice.

Kohaku slowly nodded, tried to make out if we still wanted to laugh. I nodded, too:

"So I'm in the Distract team. The celebration would be in the evening, right?"

"Yes, of course. It's the most perfect time for a _small _party."

"I supposed we have to act normally around Shiori." – I pointed out.

"That's the obvious thing to do. I hope you're a good actor. Besides, hanyous often forget their birthdays. It's a cursing day." – Yuki frowned sadly at this.

"Don't be sad, I'm a human but I forgot my birthday, too!" – comforted Kohaku.

"You're not a typical human, dude!" – chuckled Yuki, she had regained her happy feeling. Kohaku did a great job at chasing away negative feelings while he was the one who was overcome by his own sadness and misery.

I chuckled at their childish but however mature enough reactions. Hanyous were unique ones. Other creatures just weren't smart enough to understand that. Suddenly, I wondered if my savior chose which team. I cleared my throat:

"Hey Yuki!"

"What is it, ni-chan?" – She asked warily as if I had any problems.

"Well uh, do you know who saved my life the other day back then?" – I asked her nervously. Her face softened without any hint of mocking emotion.

"Oh, she, Shiori and I were the ones who reached that village of yours. Of course I know who. She doesn't have a name but she has an important role in our family. She's an amazing hanyou but quite mysterious in a creepy way. Why do you want to know?" – She added the last question with confusion.

"At least I think I need a chance to thank her. Without her, I'm not standing here!" – I confessed.

"I get it. She's in the Distract team. She succeeds in whatever she does. She's perfect." – Yuki gave me a nice smile. – "But don't waste your time asking questions. She wouldn't expose anything."

I nodded, understood. Receiving an apple from Yuki, I took a big bite and joined the others for real breakfast in the forest. I knew very little that I would deal with something nasty.

* * *

Forest today was deadly quiet and it wasn't a good sign. The birds weren't playing and singing like usual. I couldn't hear other animals. Turning to Kohaku, I whispered:

"Something's up."

"I know." – He replied shortly while preparing his weapon. I didn't bring weapons because I was sure that they weren't needed.

Automatically, I put the hood of my haori up to cover my face. Kohaku asked me:

"What's that for, ni-chan?"

"I don't want any ghosts from my past following me." – I replied, wondered if Kohaku understood.

"You caught familiar scents?" – He asked nervously.

"No, but the scents are from humans." – I answered cautiously.

"That's not so good." – He shivered. Even he was human, but he disliked his own kind.

"Stay calm, kid. Freak out would only make things worse." – I reassured the taijiya. He was a demon slayer for god sake!

But then, I cut myself off. Someone was coming really fast on a horse. I hissed:

"Hide, Kohaku!"

He ran to a distant that no-one could see him while I just simply jumped in a tree and froze like a statue. With them, I was just a black creature with two bloody red orbs. I saw a man riding a horse chasing a lion. He was ready to shoot his arrow and finish the poor animal's life. Sniffing the scent, I could tell that Kohaku wasn't able to see the horrible scene. I started to feel the portal of another world open, _inside me_. The little grumbles whispered in my ears and that hollow feeling came back again. That animal was going die. My inner mind however was furious in front of that fact. Something in me told me to get out there and rip that bastard's body into pieces. I felt like an electric current cross my body and desperately wanted me to end that animal hunter's dirty existence. My mental was thirsted to taste that _soul_ of his. What was this savage feeling?

The lion growled hopelessly. My thoughts were interrupted. The man shouted:

"Stand still, you fur-clothing!"

I was ready, ready to show him the feeling the lion had when he was about to kill him. I could imagine the satisfaction I would have when I tasted his fear of death. My mind was screaming, for the thirst to be satisfied, for the _beast _inside to be released. This feeling was quite similar to one I used to have in my previous life when I turned into a full-blooded demon but the difference was, I could still think straight. I felt like I could still take control of this, but I desired for that mortal's death. My inner mind was groaning along with the lion. Somehow, I didn't want to kill that animal as much as I wanted to murder that hunter. I could smell it, the vitality warm blood flowing in his veins, the strong fast beating heart, the tainted soul of a disgusting mindless human. If I was holding on a branch, I bet that I would have broken it right at the beginning, but I didn't let my presence noticeable. My legs were begging me to move, to jump down there and give that bastard's the lesson of life and death.

Suddenly, a giant blade appeared from thin air as my bloodlust was disturbing me. Its coaly black hilt came first in my grip, elegant and deadly. I could feel that the hilt was enough to kill something. Then the blade appeared later in a pure purple light. It was made by metal and the sharpness of it was remarkable. I touched the blade and felt some kind of energy transforming to me. How did I do it? I could tell that the blade could kill someone just by a single touch. It was telling me to get down there and cut that mortal's head off. Could I do that? Could I be a killer that I always _hated_? Somehow I found this satisfied. Why?

Before I know it, I struck, faster than anything could. The human did notice that something was around but didn't know what. He just only knew that some kind of strong wind just blew by. My blade glowed and shook lightly in my hand like it was enjoying this. I didn't make any other sound and cut his head in one thousandth second. It happened really quickly. I heard other sounds from other humans and immediately went after it. The feeling was indescribable. I felt strength leaving the corpse of that bastard after his soul left his body. That strength was transferred into _me_. It was more _delicious_ than any food I ever tasted. I saw more preys, a group of bandits. I just simply stood there and looked at them. My face was blank. I could see my own reflection in their eyes: just a black creature, standing there and looking at them blankly. The one seemed to be leader laughed:

"Who are you, chondrisome? If you want to live, hand us some money or just your blade over there."

Hearing that, I growled lowly and murderously. They surely heard it and froze. My blade was unleashing a deadly aura and the humans' spines were chilling while the aura surrounded them. I struck and after that, in front of me were eight dead corpses, with eight souls leaving this world and more strength entering my system. I eyed my blade and recognized: my eyes were coaly black, too and it was completely hollow and deadly. Then, they changed back into the bloody red color. Suddenly, I heard something moving in the bush. I glared at the leaves and noticed two humans. Oh, I missed two preys, how pathetic of me. I darted up into the tree and saw two kids, a boy and a girl hiding behind the bush. I could feel their innocent frightened soul through those eyes. They sobbed while seeing me with a giant blade hanging on a tree. I growled and they cried.

That sound, crying hit my ears. The saltiness of their tears awakened a feeling inside me. It made my heart ache. I scanned their faces carefully and tried to understand my own emotion. Another side of me tried to tell me _not to kill those kids_. I closed my eyes and clenched my fist. What was I doing before this murdering attempt? Going out for breakfast with Kohaku from the residence, right? Then why was I doing this? The kids were too scared that they didn't move. I know that if they suddenly struck, I would kill them in a blink. I didn't want to be a beast. I just killed all the bandits and an animal hunter in less than one minute. I argued the killing desire inside me and told the opening portal that it would **not **have those kids. I looked at them softly and said gently:

"Leave, now."

They looked at each other in shock, couldn't believe that I let them go without doing anything. The boy slowly backed away and then ran. The girl hesitated and eyed me curiously. She bowed me quickly and muttered:

"Arigato." Then she ran after the boy.

I stood on a branch of the tree, stunned at myself. I killed humans, without hesitation. I wasn't sure, but I enjoyed the feeling! That was so disgusting of me! How could I enjoy being a killer? But all of this seemed similar to something that I had read about in a certain book…

I caught Kohaku's scent nearby; the boy was eating some kind of pie that made of rice. My mind told me to hide the dead corpses in the area, but how could I do that? Well, it only took a blink for me to pick up all those bodies but where to throw them? The answer came right after the question. My blade shook again, wanted me to use it. I wouldn't agree if it told me to kill Kohaku, my own _brother_. But it didn't tell me to do such thing, because my determination was quite strong. The blade glowed and I pointed it to the sky without thinking. I mumbled quietly:

"Death is only the beginning."

With that, the bodies just simply _vanished_. I remained speechless at this while blinking my eyes non-stop. Footsteps approached me, and the blade soon disappeared after a flash of blue light. Kohaku came near me as I put away the hood revealing my face. He said:

"Is everything okay, ni-chan?" – Wariness was obvious in his voice.

"Everything is just fine, Kohaku-kun." – I nodded hard, trying to figure what was wrong with me.

"Did you eat anything?" – He raised his eyebrow.

"Yes, I did." – I answered, which was the truth. I ate humans' souls. – "It's time for us to head home."

"Yeah, let's go. The others didn't finish yet, but I guess we could go first." – He did his last bite and changed his direction.

"Do you want a lift?" – I asked playfully. I really needed a distraction after the event.

"It's not necessary, ni-chan." – said the taijiya shyly. I noticed his blood stayed under his cheeks and turned them into light pink.

"No, I insist, if you want then it'll be fine." – I winked my eye.

"Sure, I mean why not?" – He grinned excitedly and climbed on my back.

Right after he settled down, I darted myself into the air while Kohaku howled in great joy.

* * *

After breakfast, everything was back to normal with me. We gathered in the field to practice using weapons again, and everyone tried their best to be normal while talking to Shiori. But of course, they couldn't be as normal as usual. Keeping a secret was very hard and annoying. Amazingly, acting was very easy with me. I pretended that it wasn't her birthday and it was just another normal day at the residence. Things turned out fine, I accompanied her mostly because no-one wanted to expose the surprise and I did a good job at hiding it. Shiori was good at using sword and chains; however she got a problem with the sickles, which was weird. She was very happy practicing with me because I wasn't jumpy like the others. She asked me innocently:

"Ni-chan, why are the others quite nervous today?"

"I'm clueless." – I shrugged, gave her a "clueless" face.

"I hope they really are okay like they said." – muttered the little bat hanyou.

"Don't worry; things will back to normal in no time." – I reassured her sweetly.

I remembered that I was the one who had to ask her out on the trip with 33 other hanyous. It wasn't hard to make up a reason, but how to make it not involving the surprise. I said slowly:

"Hey Shiori, what do you think of travelling somewhere this afternoon?"

"We're having a trip? Well, that's awesome, right?" – replied Shiori excitedly, like I expected. – "Wait, is that why people are so jumpy today? They're too excited?"

"Yeah, you can say that. Since I didn't know how excitement is like, I couldn't make out that they are waiting for the trip to come." – I shrugged dumbly, such an actor I was!

"Oh, it's okay, InuYasha ni-chan! Sooner or later, you would know exactly how excitement is like!" – She said while dodging my attack.

"Have you guys gone on a trip before? Not the battles, don't get the idea wrong." – I asked her curiously.

"We go on battles mostly. This residence is where we stay most the time. The outside world isn't for hanyous, you already know that." – She said. – "Well, we went out to have fun twice. The first time didn't end up so well, but the second time was super."

"Really? Well, the beginning isn't always smooth, that figures." – I nodded. – "Where did you guys go?"

"The first time, we visit our mortal parents in a cemetery. We wanted to remember our human creators. It ended up a hideous beast attacked us." – said Shiori deep in thoughts. I re-considered about "going out to have fun" here. Going to a cemetery wasn't a way to find joy, right?

"I think you guys picked the wrong destination for the trip in the first time." – I posted my comment and she nodded.

"The second time, we visited the place where the first hanyous in this family met and from that, our pack grew stronger! It was near a waterfall inside a beautiful meadow." – She said, smiling at the memory. Now that was the right destination.

"Sounds nice, I'm not surprised that the journey was worth it." – I nodded.

"So where are we going this afternoon?" – She asked expectedly. I raised my eyebrow and replied:

"You have to ask someone else. I don't organize this. Besides, this is my first trip!"

"Oh, sorry, I forgot! It seems like you've stayed here for a long time already." – Shiori chuckled.

"Thanks, Shiori." – I said in appreciation.

* * *

After another half hour, I said "goodbye" to Shiori and headed back to my dormitory. Making sure that no-one was around, I took out the Latin book that I found in the library days ago. It had ability to shrink itself into a tiny size and stay hidden inside my _haori_. This creepy book seemed to be created for me. Checking my surrounding once more, I gently turned the pages to the chapter that I thought I should read most. The nameless hanyou told me not to miss a word in this book, and I would make sure of it, but now, I just wanted to know the main thing I needed to know. The first chapters weren't so complicated, mostly talked about three worlds. The chapter "Meidou" was very intriguing. Next one was "Death". And then, I found the chapter I was looking for: "G.O.D". I raised my eyebrow; they didn't explain what G.O.D was. I knew that it stood for something and it didn't mean "god" as in "Kami". Following in the lines, I read carefully. The paragraphs described the creatures that existed in Meidou, but the most dangerous of them all was G.O.D. So it was a creature that lived in hell. G.O.D was very rare, and they were deadly creatures. Their responsibilities were to guard hell, look after the souls, kill creatures whoever that insulted or underestimated death, or even feared death, etc… Everything involving killing was connected to G.O.D. There was a picture of a G.O.D in the next page and I gasped when I saw it. My eyes widened at the image. The creature wore black garments. He held a giant blade in his hand and tied daggers around his hip that was hidden behind the _obi_. The terrifying red eyes were cold, heartless and absolutely deadly. I swallowed some air in my stomach. _Then will you believe me if I say you not really are a living creature?_ Her voice resounded in my mind. Was that what I was? Basing on the information I just knew, I was a G.O.D, whatever it was. I continued reading the description. G.O.D owned a deadly beauty as well. That fit, tightly – I told myself. The pearly pale skin, attractive smell, soul-sucking eyes were our useful weapons that tricked our preys into their traps. But I told myself, I didn't need any of those? The preys couldn't even fight me! My strength and my speed were already enough. Different G. had different talents. Some G. didn't have special talents at all. I immediately guessed that I didn't have any talents because there was nothing special about in my previous life.

Closing the book, I hurried went out of the dormitory so no-one would question me what I was doing. I wanted to talk to her, right now. Questions danced in my brain like fireworks exploding. I didn't know whether I should be sad or happy, or maybe both. I was glad that I had become something extraordinary, but I wasn't very satisfied that I had turned into a killer. _Everything came with a price_, a small voice reminded me the rule of life. I bit my lip, who was I kidding with? I was given a new life, so of course the price must be expensive. Suddenly, a voice cut my train of thoughts:

"Day-dreaming, eh buddy?" – Kumano was walking along with me and I realized that it took him a great amount of strength to catch up with me. I decreased my speed so my friend wouldn't be exhausted when we reached the destination, wherever that was.

"Not really, I just have a lot of things to think about." – I answered with a smile. Kumano rubbed my shoulder and asked:

"What is there to think about? You still have a week more before your first battle."

"I'm not worried about that! I'm just trying to find out how I could meet the one that gave me my new life, that's all!" – I shrugged.

"Oh, the healer, right? Did you try to infirmary? She might be there, tending someone or reading another giant book." – He gave me a big grin. – "You should really be polite to her. She's nice and talented."

"It seems like you like her, Kumano!" – I teased him playfully.

"Well, what if I do?" – He looked at me innocently. – "Despite the fact that she was very private, she's a marvelous girl."

"No, nothing is wrong. But don't you think she's out of your reach?" – I asked him seriously.

"Hoping wouldn't hurt, right?" – He chuckled at my expression.

I gave him a shrug and said:

"Thanks, I think I'll head to the infirmary now."

"Well, best luck to you, InuYasha. She could be very tricky to have a conversation with."

"Thanks for the warning." – I winked my eye at him. He had no idea how many words she had spoken to me. – "Hey, and what are you up to?"

"I'm about to have lunch with my cousin, Yuki-chan. She's bugging me with the birthday preparation all morning!" – He groaned annoyingly.

"Oh, so you're in the Planners' group! I'm in the Distract team, but it seems like no-one here is a good actor." – I chuckled, replaying the expressions on everyone's faces when Shiori shot a question.

"I'm an open book and I'm aware of that. Besides, I'll be more helpful in here than out there." – He sighed and waved his hand. – "I guess we'll see each other in the party."

"Yeah, good luck, Kumano!" – I clapped his shoulder and then glided to the infirmary.

* * *

Meters away from the infirmary, I could smell herbs and extremely pure water. There weren't any scents of blood so luckily, no-one was bleeding. When I stood on the entry of the infirmary, I felt really comfortable. It looked like our goddess healer had found a way to give this place a suitable temperature so the patients would heal faster. There were flowers climbing on the walls and also ceiling. Their smells weren't heavy, just enough to chase other bad smells away and probably the scent of blood. Perhaps they could be used as herbs, too. I eyed the room. There were thirty-five beds in this room. It was unbelievably that the quantity of those beds fit the chamber, because it was just bigger than a dormitory a bit. Besides, I didn't think that there might be a solution that half of our pack would be injured. A voice cut my train of thoughts:

"It's possible for more than half of our pack to be injured when we had to go on an extremely nasty battle."

I turned my head to the source of the voice. That was weird; I didn't smell her coming, my savior.

"I have a way to hide my scent. You should learn how to do this as well." – Her blue eyes danced when she looked at me coming into the room.

"So if more than half of the residents are injured then there won't be enough beds for everyone." – I stated, even I didn't really care. Knowing her, she always had plan B.

"I could turn them into bunk beds. There are plenty of ways. Or I can just tend their wounds in their dormitories." – She shrugged.

"I see." – I nodded my head while staring at the shelves on the wall, which contained herbs, honey, fresh clothes, liquids, stuff like that.

"You must have discovered something." – That wasn't a question.

"Yes, I have found some details." – I replied. – "But I'm not sure if they're right."

"They'll be right if you think they are." – She reassured me.

"Well, I do believe. What's a G.O.D?" – I shot the question that bothered me most.

She said nothing, just looked at me waiting for the next part. Was I near to conclusion? I told her my theory:

"You and I, we are G. , aren't we?"

"Do you doubt your own judgment?" – She raised her eyebrow.

"It sounds pretty crazy to me." – I gave her a shrug.

"It's crazy doesn't mean it's not right." – She glided across the room and took something out of a shelf.

"Could you please give me a straight answer?" – I asked impatiently. This question however sounded rude.

"The answer is always right in front of you. You just don't know it." – Another statement that could drive anyone insane with their own stupidity. – "Here" – She handed me a package.

I smelled the package and recognized garments inside. She said:

"You don't have to wear black all the time if you don't like."

"So that means you enjoy wearing black." – I concluded.

"I don't have a choice." – She sighed.

"What stops you from wearing something else than black?" – I raised my eyebrow.

"It's not your business." – She avoided the question again.

"I thought someone's business in this pack is everyone's business." – I tilted my head.

"That's what you think, but not what _I _think." – She shot back. Gosh, this girl was challenging!

"Don't you trust any of us?" – I asked again.

"I don't trust myself to handle the mess you guys may get yourselves into if something about me is exposed." – She replied coldly.

"Have a little faith." – I darted to where she stood, squeezed her shoulder. – "And at least tell us your name."

"Why do you care about names so much?" – She asked calmly like she was trying to keep her emotion under control.

"I dislike calling you 'the healer', 'the nameless hanyou' or anything similar to that." – I replied gently. – "Is it _that _hard to let us know just only your _name_?" – I emphasized the words 'that' and 'name'. Those were the major things I wanted to know.

"Yes, it is." – Her bell-ringing voice sounded like this was 'the end of discussion', but unfortunately, my stubbornness didn't give in even a little yet.

"Why is that?"

"That is _because _I don't have a name." – With that, she darted out of the room, leaving me in confusion.

She didn't have a name. I tried to understand that statement fully. It meant she was born without a name, and her parents didn't bother to give her name? Or was it because no-one told her what her name was? I couldn't believe that. She didn't even have a name! That was very unacceptable. I bit my lips and tried to give her something after everything she did to me…

_A/N: I think I'll seriously stop at this chapter for a while. I'm so tired and a bit frustrated because school is about to start and I have a bunch of things to prepare. Just leave me reviews. This story wouldn't be abandoned; I mean the main part didn't come out yet so I absolutely would finish this work. If my parents or teachers kill me before I could even finish this work, then I'm glad to say that I'm not the one who will take the blames!_


	13. Game on!

Disclaim: InuYasha doesn't belong to me, but the content of this story does.

_To Sam, my loyal tail._

A/N: I think I might rate my story again since it's about to involve lots of killings and angst after a few chapters.

**Chapter 13: **Game on!

**Sesshomaru's Point of View:**

Asking Bokuseno didn't give me any help and that was just frustrating. This Sesshomaru always got what he wanted and now his curiosity was very disturbing. My companions weren't uncomfortable at all. They would follow me wherever I went and would make no comments about my intentions. However, Jaken could be annoying because he kept asking me about our destination. I was going nowhere or perhaps anywhere to satisfy my desire to know if InuYasha really was dead. I kept having a feeling that he wasn't dead, even it sounded crazy. Maybe it was because we shared the same blood so I would know if the other half had disappeared or not. There weren't any logical explanations for my hunch, but it was right. This Sesshomaru was never wrong. Right now, we were heading back to the stupid human village that the half-breed used to stay. That marvelous scent had faded. Rin seemed to recognize our direction before the imp. She said innocently:

"Sesshomaru-sama, isn't this the village that InuYasha-sama and his friends live?"

I didn't answer. She figured it out just right so it wasn't necessary to reply. The imp didn't leave it like that:

"Why do you ask such a question like that, Rin? Sesshomaru-sama won't go to that dirty place…"

I cut him off by throwing a rock straight to his head. Rin giggled happily and said:

"Jaken-sama, don't you recognize this way? It leads us right to the village!"

The imp shut up and looked around. He was too stunned to say anything else. I just kept walking until we were near the Sacred Tree and the tomb hit our eyes. What did I suppose to do now? Digging someone's tomb wasn't the right thing to do. Suddenly, a female-voice entered my ears:

"What are you doing here, Sesshomaru?" – asked the taijiya.

I didn't have to answer the human's question so I just stood there. She continued:

"InuYasha's dead, you still want to fight above his grave?"

"Why are you so sure that he's dead?" – I raised my eyebrow, looking straight at her brown eyes. The girl must have cried her eyes out that her face was very red.

"You were there when his heart stopped beating!" – She hissed angrily. The taijiya was right. I had a feeling that she wanted to add something. Oh right, she must have wanted to know if her brother was still alive.

"You want to know about Kohaku." – I stated quietly while watching her face. She froze a while and nodded.

"We didn't see or hear anything about him after Naraku's death." – sighed her heavily.

"Oh right, Sesshomaru-sama, do you know where Kohaku ni-chan is? I wonder if he's still fine!" – chirped my little girl. She remembered the young taijiya, too.

The taijiya, Sango eyed Rin and then started to sob again. Humans were so weak and emotional. I said:

"He went to Totosai's place a week ago. I saw him."

Then a silence, everyone didn't say a word. Sango tried to understand the news even it meant what it meant. She stammered:

"He… was? Why would… he go… to Totosai's?"

I wondered how smart she was. Totosai made weapons so were there any other reasons to see him? I raised my eyebrow and waited if she could get any smarter. I replied:

"The brat asked for a bunch of weapons."

She was a bit offended by the word "brat" but didn't make any comments about it. Both of us must have asked the same question "why". I went on:

"I never think the half-breed as my brother, but… no matter how I deny that, he still shared the same blood from our father with me. Something tells me he's not dead."

Those sentences escaped from my lips really quickly, but I believed that everyone who heard me had caught up with the topic. The taijiya narrowed her eyes. She whispered:

"Yes, InuYasha isn't dead that easily. I don't believe that either. None of us does, but our eyes don't fool our judgments."

"Maybe they do." – I protested calmly.

Rin listened to the conversation. I wondered if she understood any of it. Sango sighed and mumbled:

"Then tell me, Sesshomaru-_sama_, how could he manage to survive after a bunch of injuries and blood lost like that? How could he manage to still be in this world after his heart had stopped beating?"

This remained me speechless. If I knew the answer then there wouldn't be this conversation. I gave her a glare, but she was too sad to return it. A human didn't have a nerve to glare at a daiyoukai like me. Surprisingly, Rin replied:

"Sango nee-chan, Kohaku ni-chan, your brother was killed in the past but he still exists in this world! Miko-sama left her power inside him! Rin was killed by the wolves, too but Sesshomaru-sama revived Rin. There are plenty of ways for the deaths to walk around!"

Our eyes stuck on the girl. She talked all of that with such a calm normal voice like death was nothing and it wasn't hard to avoid it. Well, I wasn't surprised. She was innocent and cheerful. Her bravery was admirable for a young human girl. She wasn't afraid of me, even when I turned into a giant dog flying in the sky or when I tore my enemies into pieces. Rin was just happy that I wasn't hurt and that was all. The taijiya considered this for a moment and spoke:

"But none of that happened to InuYasha, Rin-chan."

"It doesn't have to, Sango nee-chan. Those are just examples I give you. There are more, there are always more." – beamed the child. I raised my eyebrow. How could she be so smart?

Suddenly, the monk and the old hag cut us off. They were in a hurry with obvious terror on their face. The monk said:

"We just go around catching some news. There are a lot of dead villagers, mostly male bandits, robbers, soldiers and fighters; humans and youkai equally."

**InuYasha's Point of View:**

Shiori's birthday was the most special event I'd ever been through. I didn't know what the best was. Everything was perfect. The food was mouthwatering. Yuki and _Kosua_ were two wonderful cooks, but the boys' choices of ingredients were incredible. The decorations were elegant but yet however wild and natural. They were mostly flowers and creepers. The hanyous who could create things that were useful for decorating had important roles in the party. The cake was enormous. The emotions in our residence were all overjoyed. Shiori had the greatest birthday ever. I could never imagine that hanyous' birthdays would be celebrated this big. I didn't know when my birthday was so I didn't expect anything about it. Besides, I felt like every day was birthday since I moved here. I didn't really know what I should give Shiori for her birthday so I knitted her kimono and stuff like that. For some reasons, I drew everyone in the residence based on my memories and a few pictures of Shiori and her mom. The bat hanyou was very stunned when she saw my drawings. People mocked me that I had kidnapped everyone and pinned them on the papers. We hung some of them up on the walls but of course, Shiori kept most of them. Time flew fast and at that night, I didn't go to the dormitory to sleep. Excitement overtook me and I couldn't find sleep anywhere. The night sky was still enchanted after I looked at it dozens time already. It was something that never got old…

Before the party, I was given a package of garments from the healer. I wore those clothes for the party and immediately received praises from the others. There were a lot of _haori_, _hakama_, _kosode_, _obi_, stuff like that. They were made of special materials that prevented my skin from sparkling in sunlight. I was very surprised by this. I tested the clothes carefully with myself before showing it to public. The colors were gorgeous. There were dark brown, light blue, sea blue, black and white. She really understood my taste of "fashion". There were even short-sleeved _haori _and _hakama_ that only reached my knees! At first I thought I would look dumb in that style but it turned out just fine. The short-sleeved _haori _revealed my hard marble-like forearms. I looked nice in blue, commented Kohaku. I was glad that I wouldn't be covered in black all the time. It made me upset that my savior couldn't or maybe wouldn't leave those terrifying black garments.

Soon, everything sunk into gentle silence. I scanned the area to detect unusual things but honestly, getting in this place would be almost impossible for who weren't hanyous. So I just let me nerves relax and drifted into the peaceful night. My doggy ears twitched when a noise hit the eardrums. _She _was coming. We only confronted each other when there was no-one around. Her smell was stronger than ever, I wondered why. I could feel her aura got sharper and her features might have become more remarkable. She jumped on the branch that I was standing on and leaned on the trunk. I started:

"Did you enjoy the party?"

"A part of it." – She replied shortly. – "You had a great time." – It wasn't a question but a statement.

"How come you know everything about me while I don't know a single thing about you?" – I asked while giving her the "cutest pout" I could have.

She looked at my face like it was something very interesting. She pointed out:

"You do know a few things, at least more than most people do. You know that I don't have a name, I'm the healer of a hanyous' pack, I saved your life and I can do a lot of things."

Wow, that was so unfair. I raised my eyebrow:

"No, you can do _everything_, not just _a lot of things_." – I corrected her statement.

She rolled her eyes and examined my face. Then her eyes scanned me from my head to my toes. I didn't know if there was anything special enough about me for her to be interested of. Her voice brought me back from my thoughts:

"There are a lot of interesting things about you."

"Can you read my mind or something?" – I raised my eyebrow.

"No, it's just your face." – She shrugged while examining my silver hair. – "You survived when you were suffering that flame of the transformation. Normal mortals couldn't. They would surrender the pain."

"So you mean I'm not normal?" – I asked her.

"You make it sounds like that's a bad thing." – She glanced at my outfit. I wondered if she admired her work.

"Thanks for the clothes. I can't ask for anything more than that." – I said calmly, trying to have a "normal but not so normal" conversation with her.

"Your skin looks lovely with blue." – She titled her head and commented plainly. I gulped at the word "lovely". – "Is there anything wrong InuYasha?" – It seemed like she was frowning.

"No, it's just… It's the outfit which is lovely." – I corrected her statement again.

"We can't judge the clothes InuYasha. What matters is how the one who wears it looks like with that outfit on." – She told me gently like trying to explain something patiently to a little kid. I blushed at this. I wasn't sure which the cause was, me being silly or her saying that I was lovely.

"So I presume that you have experienced the satisfactory of killing this morning." – She continued and it was obviously the topic of our talk today.

I shivered at the mention. Again, the sensation replayed in my brain, how powerful I felt when I stole those lives from the humans. I wanted to throw out even knowing that it was impossible. Despite the disgust I pushed on myself, the back of my mind still thought that it was right to kill those bandits and hunters. It seemed okay to kill bad people but the feeling I had when I did that was unforgivable. Instead of anger, sadness, regrets, or even fear, it was satisfaction that I felt. Suddenly, I felt warmth covering my fist. I didn't recognize that I'd clenched my hand into fist. I held my breath as I recognize the small but sturdy hand squeezing mine when she detected the grief I was having with myself. She said slowly:

"You are not bad, InuYasha. In fact, you're better than lots of people." – She held my hand and put it on my chest. Even there was no heartbeat; I could still feel the presence of my heart. – "Your disgust towards yourself proves your kindness and your respect with the weight of each life you took. Bad people would feel _happy_ when they know that they could kill without regrets or hesitation."

I remained speechless. She always managed to freeze me. She finished:

"That makes you better than me."

"That's not true!" – I protested without thinking, right after her statement.

"Why are you so sure?" – She asked sadly, but I felt her lips stretching into a tiny beam. – "Like you said, you don't know me so well."

"Then give me a chance to know you well!" – I threw my blow. – "After that we will see if you were better than me or not!"

She was stunned at my reaction. I chose the right time to strike. I hoped that she would give in and tell me something. But just like I expected, it wouldn't be easy. She sighed and said:

"If you know about yourself well enough, maybe you would figure it out yourself what kind of person I am."

"So we are alike." – I concluded.

"Not really." – replied her sadly. – "Not exactly alike, but we have a kind of link." – Her voice made it obvious that she wasn't happy about that fact.

"And you don't like that because…?" – I asked her gently, trying to show that I wasn't offended if she really didn't like the truth.

"No, I'm fine with it. It's just that it shouldn't have happened. It's dangerous, for you." – She sighed. – "The moment I saved you… something told me it was the right thing to do. You are the one but… no-one deserves to suffer a fate like this."

I was a hundred percent confused. I couldn't understand what she meant behind those words. It was dangerous for me to be linked with her? How was that possible? I was the one for what? And what kind of fate was she talking about that no-one deserved to suffer? I felt like there was a firework of questions exploding inside my brain. Her blue eyes stared at my thoughtful face. She sighed and offered me her hand. I hesitated at first, wondering whether I should take it or not. Then, I held her hand and she darted through the field dragging me behind her. I was stunned at first after that composed myself and ran along with her. We ran side-by-side and I wasn't surprised that her speed was more advanced than mine. Getting out of the residence in two seconds and didn't have to pass the entrance was weird. I felt like flying. In the wind, her scent was enchanting more than ever. This seemed to be a very wild dream. I glanced at my companion and saw her blue eyes sparkling in the night sky. The weak moonlight shined on our pearly pale skin. I wasn't sure if this was running or flying or maybe both, but I'd like to do this more in the future. The feeling was so super!

The forests were "noisy" as usual, at least to her and to me. Even we were running deadly fast, I could still see everything around me crystal clearly, every line. Then we stopped standing on the top of an ancient banyan tree. The wind caressed our hair playfully while whispering to the trees and animals. She looked at me then the village right in front of us. I could smell the humans. Immediately, I remembered the feeling I had when killing those human bastards. She squeezed my hand to comfort me and I did that in return to show my appreciation. She said:

"Tell me what you sense and what you feel after a few minutes."

I composed myself and stayed focus to sense something that she wanted me to sense. Most of the villagers were deeply asleep. Their breaths were stable and calm. The houses were dark because the lights were off. I gathered more focus. I noticed a family was still awake. I felt their… sadness and grief? There was the saltiness of tears, too. And then, _it _hit me. Now I knew what she was trying to tell me. That hollow feeling came again. Someone was dying. An old man who was sitting at the middle of the family, he was drifting away from this world. I closed my eyes and paid more attention to the house. The shallow breaths of his were easy to recognize. The weak heart was desperate to keep working, but it was losing the battle against death. And the next thing I expected came, a portal opened _inside _me. The call from the other world was reaching that dying human. I felt his soul was about to leave, but hesitated because of all the grief around him. If those people wanted him to have a peaceful death, they would stop mourning over his body and accept the fact. But it was easy to talk but doing it was another problem. The feeling of lost, I knew it really well. Even the past was blurred; the experience when losing someone was still sharp enough to remind me every bit of the feeling. The portal widened, calling louder for his soul. His heart rushed, trying to fight but losing even more quickly. Some sort of energy entered my system while the life of that man was being sucked away. I swallowed some air to stay calm. I spoke:

"My mind tells me that you've already known exactly what I sense and how I feel."

"Why do you think you can sense that?" – She looked at me.

"I don't know! I feel dumb! Can't you just give this idiot a useful clue for once?" – I burst out impatiently. I could feel my doggy ears drooping on my hair and a pout formed on my face.

She stared at me for one twentieth second and then, I was deadly surprised. Laughter was heard escaping from her lips. It sounded _adorable_! She said between the laughter:

"You shouldn't have done that, InuYasha!"

"Do what?" – I asked innocently. – "Make you laugh? Or ask lots of questions?"

She tightened her grip on me. I was about to ask another question but then an image appeared in my head. I saw my own face, looking at myself with my ears drooping on my hair, a very silly pout making me looked like a child asking for candy and also my eyes widening like a pup's eyes begging for explanation. I didn't look at myself a lot in the mirror or the water, but her vision was a hundred percent accurate, that was for sure. Every line of my face was perfect and exact the way it was. I was stunned at the image and speechless at how livid it was. A part of me had understood why she laughed, but the other one wondered why she didn't enjoy laughing.

"You hate laughing?" – I asked her, raising my eyebrow.

"Yeah, laughing is a useless thing to do." – She replied shortly and her cold tone had returned in a blink of eye. My spine chilled at how quick she could change her emotions.

"No, it's not! Laughing makes life better!" – I protested.

"Well, if you have to sense and feel the sensation that you just did a while ago all the time, you'll understand why there's nothing to laugh about." – She mumbled coldly.

"Is that why you're always so gloomy? Because you know it when people are dead?" – I asked. The question sounded stupid.

"Then how do you feel when you sense a dying creature?" – She asked softly, not willing to stay out of control again.

"I think we both know the answer and neither of us wants to say it out loud!" – I gave her a look, but for some reasons I could never get mad at her.

"Then answer your own question and stop questioning a bunch of things about me because that's how I live!" – It was definitely the final blow.

"Doesn't anyone get to be just a _small part _of your life?" – I asked her but it sounded more like a pleading.

"No-one should be." – She sighed. – "I think you'll figure things out quickly in your first battle."

"You mean when I taste that feeling of death again I'd know things better. Then I'd rather not know!" – I snapped a branch.

"Your life, your choice. But it's another reason that you were born for this kind of life." – She said in hidden amuse.

"I feel like that, too." – I sat down on a weak branch of the tree, but it didn't break. – "But if I want to live it right, I think _your help_ plays a big role! And from what I see, you don't live _your_ life so well either!"

"That's your point of view, not mine." – Again with that classical attack.

"Then I'm going to do things my way even it's going to influence yours." – I said playfully like a naughty boy up to something stupid.

"Oh, so what are you going to do first?" – Her challenge-mode was on!

"You really want to know?" – I smirked arrogantly.

"Not knowing wouldn't hurt." – She shrugged.

"Aaah, are you saying that you aren't willing to take a small risk?" – Just a little push.

"You know, that childish kind of push wouldn't work on me." – I felt like she was smirking, too and groaned in defeat.

"That's not fair, you can read my mind!" – I complained.

"Not my fault that your thoughts keep flowing into my brain." – She chuckled darkly and a wave of shivers crossed my body.

"Then are you still young enough for a childish deal?" – I asked.

"We're never too old for something." – That was a good sign.

"Okay, whenever I make you express an emotion, you have to tell me something." – I told her.

"That's all?" – She asked.

"That's all." – I nodded.

"Game on." – She announced.

"What will you say if we race back to the residence and definitely to teleport or fly or cheat in any ways?" – I asked her.

"Whatever." – She replied. Sometimes I was frustrated with her depression.

"One… two…" – I counted.

"Three." – She mumbled and we both tore the air apart, leaving the wind far behind.

_A/N: So how was it? I'm a bit down these days and I'm not in the mood to write. Just leave the reviews and I'll consider if I should continue. _


	14. Author's Note

A/N: I know that many of you (or perhaps all of you) would be disappointed when you recognize that this isn't a chapter, but an author's note. Actually, I'm not event eh author. When there's an A/N, I guess you all know that there would be requests or bad news and this one would be bad news.

The worst news is always that the story wouldn't be continue anymore and unfortunately, it's the main reason for this note. I'm really sorry and there's nothing I can do about it. My sister (Kanna016) is the author and she owns this account, but she can no longer do that. I don't want to talk about the cause because it's our private business.

Since my sister can no longer write any more stories, I would be the one who inherits her account. I'm not her (it's really obvious) so I can't finish her work, she has a unique mind in our family and only her could do this kind of thing for _fun_. I can't write for manga/anime so I would post stories for TV shows, movies and books mostly.

About this story, _Gomen ne, InuYasha_, Tammy (that's her real name) told me the main plot so I can just tell you about it if you want to continue this story (feel free to do that).

- InuYasha found out that he's the Guardian of Death and he would be really powerful in meidou or whether there's a dying creature nearby. He could also suck energy and powers from other living creatures if he wanted. His hatred towards demons increased because of some reasons (she didn't tell me).

- Even having a new family and very dear friends, Kohaku still missed his sister very much and sometimes went nearby to help her with the housework when she wasn't around, unaware that it would leave his scent in the hut of the village and was busted by Sesshomaru. The demon lord tried to interrogate the taijiya and that leads to the fight between Sesshomaru and InuYasha. Of course, the dog demon soon found out about the new InuYasha with completely different powers, fighting styles and personalities.

- Even though, a part of the inu-hanyou still belonged to the living world so in new moon, he would turn into his human appearance but he could still suck lives from other creatures (by the blade of death).

- InuYasha named the hanyou-girl Suki, means the moon because he thought she was mysterious, modest, gentle and beautiful like the moon.

- Romance between InuYasha and Suki (even Suki never spoke it out loud and just denied it). Love triangle InuYasha/Suki/Kumano.

- Suki blew up a village by her thoughts while fighting when Sesshomaru tried to kill a hanyou in their team. InuYasha discovered that Suki controlled the death while he was the one who protected the living.

- The last will of Shikon no Tama (she just spoke about this quickly and I don't remember this part, something involving curses)…

- InuYasha talked to his father and mother.

- Anyway, it ends with Sesshomaru and InuYasha created the first bond between them, InuYasha and Suki ruled the Northern Lands with all the hanyous, Kagome/Kouga, Sango/Miroku, Kohaku/Kanna, Kumano/Yuki.


End file.
